Saturday Morning Grail War
by Ol'Velsper
Summary: Because if good emerged victorious and evil were decisively vanquished, the plot wouldn't continue onwards into a new season.
1. Chapter 1

Type Moon, cures all fungal infections, just one application! Type Moon is wholly owned and operated by Type Moon (tm). All additional references belong to their respective companies.

Pilot - The Last Battalion

* * *

_1945\. Tokyo, Japan._

Smoke choked the skyline of Tokyo. In the distance, ambulance sirens and flashing lights could be seen as parts of the city burned. A buzzing nest of angry planes buzzed through the skies, exiting and entering a truly massive zeppelin to refuel and rearm. Several more blimps rained destruction down upon the city, clearly intending to wipe Tokyo off the face of the earth.

The monetary damage? In the millions.

The loss in life?

Incalculable.

A Junkers Ju-87, showing significant wear on its hull, dove out beneath a particularly thick cloud of ash. The propeller on it chugged and roared angrily as it defied the world by staying in the skies. It wouldn't fall until it took out its target.

The dive bomber's targets, two solitary figures at the end of a long stretch of a main thoroughfare, looked utterly bored as they stared up into the skies. As they were practically the victors of the Holy Grail War, Saber and his master were utterly indifferent to the Nazi plane descending on them.

"Saber, end this farce." Anita Edelfelt's eyes were lidded, bags beneath them adding years to her appearance. Her dress limpidly hung off her frame as she pointed up at the bomber coming for her. "I just...I just want this to end."

Their surroundings, filled with overturned cars and empty, desolate buildings only underscored the cost that had been paid to take down Lancer. The battle with Lancer had cost the people everything, hadn't it?

Saber, keenly aware of the loss as well, grimly set his expression. The plane was stared down at like the gnat it was. He reached to his side, armored gauntlets clasped around the hilt of the blade he wore at his side.

The divebomber roared down the empty streets, its echoes bouncing and gaining increasing ferocity.

The knight class Hero grinned, but it was a sharkish thing, filled with an eagerness to end a life. His Master could only watch with quiet desolation as her noble ally had been brought down so low by the War, but she couldn't even raise a voice in protest. It wasn't fair to voice them after everything she had done to him, now was it?

The plane began to rain death upon the duo. Moving like quicksilver, Saber positioned himself between the instruments and his Master, making Anita flinch and briefly stare at Saber in shock and wonder. Her brief moment of euphoria vanished when she saw the wild, animalistic gleam in the man's eyes as he swung his blade in front of him in a dazzling dance, sending the bullets flying out of range.

Anita merely glanced down as Saber's mad laughter carried him further away from his Master. His speed only increased further as the divebomber drew closer, trying to get past the merciless Hero to try and gun down the weaker half of the team. Not eager enough to meet her maker yet, Anita Edelfelt used the brief window bought by her mad Servant to rush behind cover.

Saber laughed, pitch of voice and actions like a loon as he threw himself up into the skies. The Junkers attempted to ascend, but the curled up knight was as unstoppable as a wrecking ball. His gleaming armor, stained with all manner of fluids, punched through the hull of the plane as he tore into it with savage fury.

Anita Edelfelt ran out behind her cover, hand raised to her mouth in horror as the plane and her Servant went crashing into the side of a building.

"Saber!" She screamed, heart leaping to her throat as she saw the building begin to collapse in on the divebomber. Smoke and flame belched out of the side of the building that the plane had collided up against.

Anita hitched up her long skirts to race after them, but...

A gunshot rang out.

"Now, now, fraulein. I don't think your lover requires a wet nurse at his age, ya?"

A vile, hateful voice spoke up even as Anita collapsed, clutching at her ruined leg. Even as her wound freely bled, she still had enough force of will to cast all of her loathing towards the jolly looking man who was idly twirling his firearm and approaching her.

"Gordo!" Anita's expression turned animalistic. "This was never meant to involve these people!"

Clad in the same impeccably white uniform he had been wearing for most of the war, which managed to defy all expectations and remain clean even in this firestorm, Gordo Yggdramillenia offered her a gentile smile.

"It's a war, fraulein." Gordo chuckled. "Acceptable losses are to be expected, no? Didn't you agree to this?"

Anita flinched. Maybe at some point, but-

"Well, there is no need to worry." Gordo leveled his service arm up towards her forehead. He had a diabolic cast to his eyes, reflected in the flames in the building behind them. "I'll take good care of Siegfried for you."

"You monster..."

"It was not I who split him in twain, fraulein."

One last shot rang out.

* * *

_Fuyuki, Japan._

The bowstring of an arrow twanged.

Another zeppelin went down in flames, crashing into the bay with a titanic crash.

"Good show, old chap." Hiroto Tohsaka mused, lowering his binoculars. His mustache twitched as mild dismay appeared on his face. "Well, now that's hardly sporting."

Twenty more zeppelins were approaching in the distance.

Besides him, Odysseus peered down the side of Mt. Enzou. His sharp eyes could pick up multiple metal boxes - tanks, was it?- moving up the side of the mountain. The man shifted his leather tunic slightly as he drew another arrow from his quiver.

"Any luck, madam?" The Heroic Spirit called behind them. "We need to put a stop to this debacle before it spreads out of control."

The flighty, but strangely insightful foreigner that Odysseus and Hiroto had run into half a week ago looked up from the spell circle she was sitting cross legged within. Hiroto briefly glanced back, but immediately turned red and looked away from the woman's vulgar way of sitting. "No." The amnesiac magus pointed out. "I can't figure out what Lancer's spear did to the ritual circles, but the energy is spiralling out of control."

"It's most likely reached Tokyo at this point, Master." Odysseus pointed out. "And we haven't heard a word from that Einzbern woman in hours. We either have to destroy the circle now, or risk letting it fall into their hands."

Hiroto's grip on the radio Anita had given him tightened. It was simply unbelievable that the Master of Lancer had so thoroughly played them all. The mere thought of him having hidden away this army with the help of Caster was ridiculous.

"It isn't fair, is it?" The nameless magus that Hiroto had run into spoke up. When the man glanced back at her, a sympathetic look was on her face. "They ruined this, right?"

"It...it was supposed to be more than this." Hiroto weakly replied, head lowered as he mumbled his pathetic response. "The power of the Grail shouldn't be misused for such petty worldly affairs. It was going to be for something..."

Grander.

"Greater men have fought for such petty affairs." Odysseus pointed out, smiling just a touch bitterly.

Hiroto winced, recognizing what his Servant hinted towards. "My apologies." He ducked his head. "I just don't..."

"Not everyone need love their country."

"My government persecuted-"

"I'll handle these ruffians up here." Odysseus cut Hiroto off. When the man gave him a look of alarm, the Hero merely smiled. "No harm. I understand you as well as you do I. Take the girl and go to the Grand Grail. Shut it down before they get down there, alright?"

Hiroto briefly considered the radio.

There was no time left.

He hooked the device onto his belt and gave Odysseus a firm nod, drawing a smile from the Archer. Taking the foreign woman's hand in his, both of them rushed for the secret entrance to the Greater Grail hidden within Ryuudou Temple.

Odysseus sighed as he glanced up at the army that both descending and ascending to meet him.

"Bah, what happened to turning men into pigs?" The man mumbled in annoyance. Pigs at least had the decency to die easily. Even if it was rather troubling to find out the identity of such after the fact. "Concealing an army as a bottle of mosquitoes is just plain underhanded, Circe."

He drew back his bow towards another zeppelin.

Down below, the bellows of the transmogrified Panzer IV - nightmareish blends of steel, gunpowder, and a rhinoceros, could be heard as they trampled up the side of the mountains. Detonations followed in their wake.

Truly, Circe lived to make his life more difficult, didn't she?

* * *

The twisting path to the Greater Grail was more dangerous than ever. The years hadn't been kind to the spiraling steps that led down to the grail. If Hiroto was more of a betting man, he'd put himself in a fisticuffs match against the Bartholomei heir on them not lasting the next century.

Not that it'd probably last more than ten minutes with conditions as they were. Hiroto and his sidekick were practically thrown from the small footpath as the entire chamber was rocked by explosions from above. The heir of the Tohsaka family had to take his comely assistant into his arm and practically bound down long paths of the platform as they gave up the ghost and crumbled down into the pit below them.

Hiroto's homburg fluttered off into the darkness.

"Mister Tohsaka!" The blonde shrieked in terror, burying her head into the crook of his neck. Hiroto didn't let the pleasing, if entirely too distracting for this situation, sensation divert his attention though. With a snap of his wrist, he sent a rapidly uncoiling length of gold up in the direction his hat had flown towards.

The chamber was briefly lit up.

Hiroto's entire body was tugged upwards, arresting his motion.

His foreigner friend yelped as she nearly fell out of Hiroto's grasp, but a grip of sheer desperation kept her from letting go of the Tohsaka. Both magi slowly descended towards the bottom of the Greater Grail chamber, carried aloft by Hiroto's hat. The grey cap had swollen up, now large enough that it could easily support the weight of both of them.

They leisurely descended the rest of the way.

"Y-you saved us!"

"Not so, dear." Hiroto's felt his lips curl disapprovingly as he gazed downwards. Leon Yggdramillenia, former Master of Caster, calmly stood between them and the Greater Grail. "I think we still have one last challenge to get through."

"Sir..." The blonde curled up against his side fearfully as she gazed down at the stoic man. Despite the sheer white uniform he was wearing, it only served to make the shadows cast around him grown even deeper in contrast. Something about the way the shadows curled beneath him... "Something is wrong." She whispered.

"Quite." Hiroto guided them with minor gusts of wind towards Lion. "What a dreadful day to forget my other Mystic Codes." He gustily complained, eyes gleaming dangerously. "Well, I suppose we'll see who wins this round this time."

The second in command of the Last Battalion descended on the two magi.

* * *

Massive zeppelins, even as they trailed fire from the ragged cuts in the sides of their cloth, rained fire down upon the top of Mt. Enzou. The earth itself cracked and heaved upwards as the detonations went off perfectly. A massive wound in the very earth itself was revealed, with an massive tower of stone standing in the very center.

The pilots of the intact zeppelins, which maneuvered around their fellows collapsing dirigibles, launched hooks down into the pit that was revealed. If any of them noticed the black tar that was seeping out from where the hooks pierced the stone construct, they either didn't care or intentionally looked away.

Within a few hours, the Great Grail was leaving Japanese airspace.

* * *

_2007\. London, England._

A set of steely eyes stared at the magus across the table over a pair of dark sunglasses. A cigarette, thick but unlit, rolled from one side to the other of the man's hand as he nodded appreciatively at a tightly clothed figure of the waitress serving their drinks. The waitress gave him a wan, slightly fearful smile. Of course, the boy across from him could be made of stone for all the reaction he had to the waitress's flirty look.

Kairi Shishigou really hated jackasses like these. They were practically drowning in poon and they didn't do a single thing to deserve it. It was practically criminal.

"Times up. Show your hand." He growled at the puny magus across from him. When the man flinched at his tone, he merely leaned towards the young boy. He flexed, his rippling muscles bulging beneath the leather of his jacket. "Now, yes?"

The magus nervously nodded.

So he was going to rip this asshole off - goddamned useless Lothario.

It was the only way to balance the universal karma!

Really!

* * *

Kairi grinned, counting his money. With his head down, he missed seeing an elderly woman pause outside her door, stare out at him, and promptly slam the door shut as she turned back inside. The feel of the universal karma flows reorienting around him positively were too much of a thrill for him to really care what people thought.

If the universal karma flows looked like a few thousand dollar bills, more power to him, right?

You can't spend karma in this life after all.

The towering redhead casually entered an alleyway, moving towards a shortcut back to his loft. Maybe if he was lucky, he could run into Miss Luviagelita's daily workout? Well, only if her thrice damned butler didn't close the curtains.

He really needed to upgrade that sparrow's skull to a better one soon.

Would probably be too hard to conceal an owl up there, wouldn't it?

Still, it might be worth it...

A goofy grin cracked his stoic demeanor, looking positively ghastly on his face.

"Hee-hee-hee..."

His brief little fantasy about Elina Luviagelita's co-ed body was banished as a particular twirp appeared in front of him.

"H-hey!" The magus from the bar - Manou? Makiri? Mayoi? Something that slipped the large man's mind - shouted in a trembling voice. "Give me that back!" He angrily roared, waving his arms in front of him.

Kairi blinked. "These? I like these guys, though. Me and them have become like- soulbrothers, man." He quirked his head, spreading the bills in front of him like a fan. "Soulbrothers don't part." The man dismissively sniffed at the puny little kid in front of him.

"T-that is..."

"Possession is nine tenths of the law, kid." Kairi lightly fanned himself with the money, eyes half lidded. "Besides, you wanted to show off and say you beat me, right?"

The magus flinched.

"Well, this is the counterbalance." Kairi clicked his tongue at the boy. "Now get the hell out of my face, kid. I'm missing prime time here. Her little sister is going to get home soon and then it's Bitch Quest: 2007 for the rest of the night."

No happy time for lil Kairi then.

Kairi raised an eyebrow as the magus in front of him growled. The air began to fill with tension as magic began to gather.

"Boy..." The older of the two magi warned, teeth flashed in a grim smile. "You might not want to go down this route. Especially for paper route money."

Whatever the boy might have done next was lost to the ages.

"Argh!"

The entire world went bloody for the man. His towering frame suddenly collapsed up against the side of the alleyway, sending bills fluttering to and fro. Kairi groaned, fighting back the urge to bellow as he clutched at his hand and thrashed in agony while the smell of burning flesh filled the alley.

He rolled onto his back, sightlessly staring up at the sky.

Moments later, a massive airship, which held aloft by massive balloons, moved across the skies above. Its mass was enough to shadow London completely as it swept past the city. Countless people quickly threw up their hands in recognition, sending out cries of entreaty towards the flying behemoth. Their desperate wishes, of course, were ignored.

It had come here for only a select few.

The small magus, uncaring about what just had happened, quickly moved to secure his allowance.

Forget wish granting vessels, he wasn't going to be getting a lectured by that shrew that called itself his mother!

"Hah, sucks to be you, dickwad." The boy kicked Kairi in the side, making the man groan in renewed pain. He glanced down at the mark on the back of the giant man's hand. "Hope you die first in the Holy Grail War."

With that last curse, he quickly ran away.

Kairi was left staring up at the blue skies above. His glasses, having fallen off his face, revealed his calm gaze.

"Well, fuck." He mused, lip quirking in a frown. "I'm going to have to find one of those goddamned fire runes now."

Kairi certainly wasn't going to be leaving his corpse around for one of his friends to figuratively fuck over when he was dead. Or perhaps literally, if Jessica was feeling especially creepy that day.

Goddamnit, why'd he have to choose to be a necromancer again?

Why'd he think it'd attract chicks?

* * *

The airship _Falcon_, continued on its endless voyage. Deep inside its cargo hold, a chamber composed of pulsing meat, sat the Grand Grail. With its mark on its chosen champions in London, the ancient device sent another pulse of prana surging through the countless nerves racing from the towering black tower throughout the airship.

Propellers twisted and excess energy was vented as the ship headed in the direction of Shinjuku, Tokyo. Far below, the massive blast zone that had once contained most of central Europe stretched out below the Last Battalion's final weapon. A twisting plum of dark smoke was left in the airship's wake as it headed to the east.


	2. Chapter 2

Type Moon, cures all fungal infections, just one application! Type Moon is wholly owned and operated by Type Moon (tm). All additional references belong to their respective companies.

01 - Necromancer

* * *

_It didn't matter what I did, the marks on the back of my hand refused to leave._

_So, this is what it's like to be humanity's bitch._

_Oh sure, those religious nut jobs said that the stigmata was something good and right. But they weren't the ones that were making a 'grand, noble sacrifice' for the 'benefit of all who still lived'. That was just the party line. Everyone with one of these marks were logs for the blast furnace of the Falcon._

_Once you got one of these, you were hunted down and slaughtered like a pig, then turned into fuel for that juggernaut that flies over our heads. Everyone that's tried to fight, run, or hide lose in the end. Gotta hand it to those Yggs, they're efficient little bastards._

_There's even rumors that they got the blessings of the One._

_Anyway, I heard that you get to choose the way you go out if you surrender. If you don't democracy kicks in at the worst possible time. I guess ratings improve if the viewers at home get to decide._

_Not that I know, I never watch that trash. I was born with a delicate soul, swear on my mama._

_Now then, let's see if I can squirm out of my obligation towards mankind. It really wouldn't work out. I'm not really the messiah-type, y'know? My schedule is too packed for me to pencil in burning for eternity too._

* * *

Countless people milled about the giant, box-like airships like worker ants. They pulled out pipes and tubes of various colors, connecting ship to the fuel pipes underground. While the ship refueled, several more workers joined in, pulling along a large-leather sack over.

Their job completed, the ants disassembled the tubing and scurried over to the next giant.

The powerful engine on the ship sputtered to life. Rapid beats, like the gibbering of a mad god echoed throughout the massive steel coffin created to seal it away. Excess flame spewed forth from the heart of the engine, harmlessly splashing against the stone ground. While this happened, smoke billowed out.

Like a living snake, it twisted itself into the sac, and swiftly began to fill it up as it made its nest.

The entire machine began to quake - it seemed to be trying to tear itself apart at the seams.

As fuel was burnt away in an excess of wealth, the world finally decided that the proper price had been paid. With a final groan, the massive machine took to the air, fighting for every inch as it clawed its way up to the skies. Its tottering ascent was reminscient of a toddler's first steps, but it eventually straightened itself out.

The moment it did, massive amounts of fuel were voraciously devoured. Flame and smoke erupted out of the airship's exhaust vents as it shot forwards.

A grungy looking city, composed of glass, steel, and concrete was left behind. It crossed golden wastelands. Dried out trees, looking more like ash than actual plants, stubbornly tried to grow in this land. Endless seas of sand, piling upwards in massive dunes, flew past them in blurs of gold and silver.

Beyond the city and desert, large metal towers stuck out along this path. Machines within, set to dig up the oil beneath the sands, endlessly churned. Small groups of airships clustered around these drills, and even more at the refinery at the center of the largest cluster of drills.

Despite variations on their designs, all the airships shared one common trait: a twisted, broken down tree somewhere on the vessel.

Once the airship was out of friendly air space, it's flames began to burn even more rapidly, speeding it up more.

Within the depths of the ship, a figure that had been leaning on an ornate seat of metal opened his eyes. The gears and pounding pistons of the engines behind him were summarily ignored. Only the cracked black and white monitor in front of him mattered. It showed an image of the world, and an island several thousand miles away was glowing on the display.

The green irises, slitted like a reptile, contracted as the gray haired man felt his heart begin to excitedly beat within his chest.

A nearby display chimed and automatically opened several more vents as the temperature in the room sky rocketed. Outside, the ship's flames burned blue as the airborn coffin gained even greater speed.

* * *

Hiroto Tohsaka straightened his maroon suit, dusting it off of imaginary lint. The cufflinks, almost having fallen off in melee, were tightened. A summoned breeze helped him coif his hair, the lines of grey on it an inescapable sign of his age.

He reached up and smartly rapped on the wooden door in front of him with his glove encased hand. The sensation of eyes watching him from every angle merely made him frown, but the polite, high pitched girlish call behind the door made him nervously begin to twist the edge of his mustache.

Moments later, the door opened, revealing a dark skinned girl standing in what appeared to be a hastily thrown on dress.

"Long time no see, Hiroto." She glanced behind him, laughing at what she saw. "You're as fit as ever."

Hiroto returned her greeting, ignoring the three bodies behind him.

The multitude of holes through their bodies, some the of size of his fist, would eventually heal up. It was in the nature of this realm, nothing ever stayed the same here.

"Come in. Oh, and leave the umbrella at the entrance, okay?"

Of course, what kind of gentleman carries an umbrella into a home?

* * *

Kairi sometimes wished that Clocktower did something about the mural at the entrance to the piers.

A friend of his had recently told him that the next shipment of people would arrive today.

A nice, thick fog rolled out from the sea just as he walked past the mural and entered the area properly.

Like the racist depiction on the mural Kairi passed, this fog was Clocktower's way of greeting the people that were being brought here from the New World. The mundane greeting depicted, amongst other things, animalistic tribals from a dark hole in the wall, powerful and kind white men, and blatant lies about their future job prospects. Overall, it was sad, but not very dangerous.

The magical equivalent of the mural was a deathtrap. Or maybe some kind of pyramid scheme.

Kairi spent a few moments groping around in the fog. He decided to let the fog work with him when he found himself unable to find the auction market

The redhead taking his protective glasses off.

"I hate having to do this." Kairi said, feeling the fog begin to affect his magic circuits through his eyes. It really, really hurt if you weren't ready for it. The sudden punch to your system basically weakened you.

He really needed to get a map.

Now that the curse was in his system, the fog began to affect him. Kairi felt a bit faint; with a bit of a headache to spice it. A throbbing started behind his left eye. Before it could get worse, Kairi had completed following the silent instructions given to him by the curse.

A large, shadowy factory appeared within the fog.

Fortunately, he didn't have to follow the pattern to its conclusion.

"It's like hunting foxes with tanks." Kairi said, putting on his glasses. The curse broke as soon as the treated sunglasses shielded his view from the magical fog. He could've also triggered his circuits to break the curse, but there was no need to show off.

It was just a simple curse to capture the untrained.

Now that he wasn't under the curse, Kairi headed towards the gate leading towards his destination. The one that the bedazzled people would enter would lead to a cage and a questionable end.

The fog vanished, revealing the true docks.

Unlike before, these docks were full of merchants and goods. Of course, there was only one kind of good for sale...

A foreigner screamed out something in a language Kairi couldn't quite grasp, thrashing and hollering in the grasp of two sailors which practically defined the word 'goon'.

...Like that one.

In a frenzy, the man attempted to bite through the poor sailors' arms. While normally that somewhat reasonable idea, it wasn't going to help the foreigner this time.

Their eyes were dead, the sailor's expressions were slack. They weren't humans anymore. The two of them were just pathetic creatures of meat and bone, only kept alive by whatever magical programming had replaced their ability to think.

There were plenty of nasty side effects that started cropping up if you kept a living creature under too long.

That's why spirits were better long term servants. You could control them as for as long as you wanted, and no real damage was done to the spirit.

But if you were abusive, you had to make sure to never let up on control. The second you did, well...

Spirits had long memories.

Oh, it seemed that the foreign slave had gained a second wind. But instead of running away, he was desperately pointing towards in the direction of the Grindery.

"Huh, interesting." While Kairi's new friend had struggled enough to slow down his minders, a defeated looking slave had been lead into the infamous cannery in the back of the auction site. The building, standing tall above the rest, was how the land's Lord got a final use out of slaves.

If they didn't sell as 'humans', he'd sell them as 'products'.

Kairi frowned, his eyes following as a flood of intangible souls blasted out of the Grinder when the door opened. Annoyingly enough, the spirits were as deranged as a ghost could be without collapsing into a shapeless curse.

Someone was going to be having a bad day.

And he was going to miss a few easy jobs.

Then again, Kairi had only come to the city because of this site. The barbaric way that the unwanted slaves were killed, and the butchering of their earthly remains was a very simple, easily repeated formula that created very strong, hateful ghosts.

Curiously enough, the primary product sold here were regents for necromancers.

Wasn't capitalism great?

Kairi's newly revealed necromancer friend began to zealously fight his handlers. The guy was smart enough to instinctively know he wasn't going to be relaxing anytime soon if he died. Most importantly, Kairi knew the same.

Necromancer souls were the worst.

Someone with the gift for necromancy would rally the rest if it turned hateful. The last thing Kairi needed on his conscious was to allow an uprising of the undead. He already had to deal with the fact that his steady paychecks were the result of this place.

"Oh, hey!" Kairi called out, stopping the meat sacks in their tracks. "I want to look at that slave."  
The zombies began to shuffle towards him now that the magic words had been spoken.

"Mmph?" One of the sailors moaned, drooled escaping from the side of his mouth. Kairi assumed the way the sailor's eyes were rolling in his head seemed to be communicating something to him.

Kairi activated his circuits, feeling the pulses in the meat sack's body. Ah, it was some sort of morse code, that was clever.  
"No," Kairi shook his head, ignoring the way the man was desperately waving his arms towards him. He reached into his pocket and drew out a cigarette. "I don't really care about his circuit count. Tell me what he knows."

"Uuh?"

"It doesn't matter if he knows mathematics. I don't need any of that for my magecraft." The large man spread his hands. A thought let him ignite the cigarette in his mouth, causing the metal within it to glimmer. "This is all I need - simple addition. How much is he?"

It was easy to conceal the thick needle inside his cigarette. The meat sacks were too long gone, and the auction site's Lord wasn't even directly controlling these two.

"Aaah?"

"... that's pretty cheap, huh." Kairi mused, pretending to second guess the offer. "Does he do any tricks?" He glanced over at the man, locking eyes with the slave. Kairi found understanding there.

"...mph."

The Command Seals on his arm pulsed. Time was running out.

"Don't want him." Kairi finally declined, and walked away. He flicked his cigarette back, making it land before the slave.

If he wanted to live so badly, he could just save himself. Just like his teacher had taken care of herself several years ago.

Or kill himself before he went mad.

* * *

Kairi's eyes scanned through the crowd. He was looking for a specific market stalls at the moment. Their owners sometimes greeted him. Sometimes they didn't. It wasn't any skin off his nose, most of these people were acquaintances.

"Kairi-kun, what's wrong? For once, it doesn't seem like you're wandering around with your head up your ass." Takano, an oriental woman, called out to him. She was one of those barbarian-types from over in Asia, third generation. Kind of messed up she was working at one of these places, but what could you do?

We all need money.

And she was the one that he had been meaning to find.

"Not helping you meet quota." Kairi replied, sounding bored.

"Who says I wanted to talk to you about that?!"

"Don't feel like playing the hot and cold game today either, thanks. I lose that one every time we play."

Takano frowned, shaking her head. "You're incorrigible, but I still am wondering why you're here. You couldn't of run out of materials already." She said, leaning forwards.

It was a totally manufactured attitude, but it was pretty cute.

Who knew maniacs could be adorable?

"I'm disturbed you're keeping track of my purchases that well."

"Eh, gotta know when to show you all of my good stuff." And wasn't that statement just positively dripping with implications. "So, if you're not here for me..."

"And I'm not."

"Going to see Teene, huh?" Takano sounded a bit displeased, making him shrug. Takano wasn't the boss of him.

Kairi wasn't stupid enough to say it, but he could very well think it hard enough.

Maybe some day it'd get him somewhere. Somewhere far away . He'd just have to get the information that he needed from her.

"Little redskin hasn't come out of her hole in a while. I think she might have died." She smiled.

Kairi smirked at the attitude. He wondered just how much Clocktower hated the necromancer's master. She had pretty big ones for setting up her workshop next to their auction site.

"Don't sound so cheerful," Kairi wiggled his fingers. "Knowing her, she'd just get stronger in death." That girl was stupidly broken that way. "Then where would we all be?"

"Our scalps would probably be up on her walls." Takano laughed, unashamed with her statement.

"Well, I've that's more than my recommended dose of racism for the day, Takano."

"Thought you always had time for more."

"Don't you know? That's only for the ironic kind."

Kairi patted his jeans, reaching ino it and handing her a small box without looking. She blushed a little bit as her fingers came in contact with his, but he shot down that idea before it even began to form.

"Not for you."

"Y-you... jer-" Yet her expression fell when she saw the stigmata on the back of his hand. It was rather comical to see that look of horror on her face. Kairi wondered if his face had been the same when he saw the Command Seals. "- why didn't you do this sooner, Kairi."

"If something happens, tell her that I love her." Kairi said with a wave, moving towards the back of the market. "Later, Takano."

"Ah. I'll tell her." Takano listlessly replied, holding onto the box. "Yeah, later."

* * *

It was always such a pain for Kairi to make his way through his master's boundary field. Expensive as well.

He lowered the smoking barrel of his shotgun, and stepped over the mummified head in his path. The limp, noodley body spastically twitching to his side was ignored as he touched the doorknob ahead of him.

Like that, the barrier fell, taking with them the dreamlands he had been wandering through. The clouds in the skies lost their technicolor hues, the land oriented itself beneath his feet, and the horrors he had barely made his way past were restored and set back to their patrols.

It was going to be such a hassle to make his way back through them again.

Kairi sheathed the sawed off shotgun onto the leather harness hanging off his back, feeling a set of eyes focus on him. The pressure vanished, and the wooden fangs that had been swiftly rising up to bite his hand off retracted back into the door. Seemed she was alright with seeing him today, how lovely.

Bone dust clung to the bronze knob, flaking off his hand as he turned the knob. Before he stepped through the open door, he shook his hand free of the remainder of the dust. The scent of incense filled his lungs as he entered the dim workshop.

Soft leather squished beneath his feet. Feeling it tense beneath him, Kairi sighed and began to remove his boots. The ground smoothed itself out once he set his combat boots outside, next to leather riding boots.

"Someone's here?" Kairi asked, glancing up as he closed the door shut. His question was to the skull of an animal he wasn't familiar with growled an assent, its empty eyes animated by two fey-like spheres of light which danced within it.

Moving deeper within the workshop, he passed several bookcases and shelves. The petrified wood they were carved from were still aromatic, making this portion of his master's shop smell like the woods after a fresh rain.

Briefly, he saw a pair of eyes within the knothole of a rather misshapen bookcase. The animal chittered at him.

Kairi continued moving.

The fresh scents of the forest gave way to a more earthy smell.

Both the leather floor and ceiling were gone here, revealing dark grey soil and a bright sun high above. Golden plant stalks grew in clusters throughout the area, making it annoying for him to navigate without accidentally damaging any of it. Plus the loose earth got in between his toes as Kairi made his way towards a cluster of work benches.

His eyes roved around, taking in several hand held totems and half done cloth charms with no little amount of greed.

A miserable, agonized looking man gazed up from its workbench.

The spirit, gaunt in appearance, set down the dark steel chisel he was manipulating to chip at a colorful gemstone. His eyes showed visible pain, silently shaking his head at Kairi.

"Hmph, like I need your warning, first. I'm not an idiot like you. 'Look, but don't touch.'" Kairi said, sneering a little.

The spirit briefly flared red. Its expression was murderous, but the manacle that was floating along where its 'ankle' stood glowed. A forgetful expression crossed the ghost's face as it glanced around.

"Get back to work." Kairi reminded his senior. He eyed the dozens of totems on a table behind the man. "Maybe she'll let you rest when you're done."

Looking hopeful again, the young man returned to carving the gemstone.

Kairi's ear perked up as he heard a laugh deeper inside the workshop. His master was entertaining a guest? Well, that was a new one for him.

He headed in deeper.

* * *

Two figures, who looked like they had been in the middle of conversation, turned towards him.

"Well, look who's not a slob today." Teene said. The dark skinned native American girl before him smiled. ""And actually taking off your shoes?" She commented as he did so, grimacing as his socks came in contact with the throbbing leather that composed the interior of the magus' workshop. "My, you must want something."

"Of course not, Master." Kairi responded. "Who's Mr. Mustache?"

"He's my lover." Teene casually replied, drawing a startled cry from the rather worn looking man that was sharing the girl's favorite rug. Her light eyes focused on him intensely, and the young girl smirked devilishly. "Why, jealous?"

"M-my good lady," The japanese man stuttered, "You may be as lovely as a wildflower, but I am a happily married ma-"

"Who'd want a wicked hag like you?" Kairi summed up with a laugh. Teene narrowed her eyes at him. The leather wall next to his face suddenly lashed out, a fist forming out of the matter to slam into his chin. He stumbled back two steps. "Okay, I deserved that." The man grumbled, and lightly shook his head.

The Japanese man simply raised his hands, surrendering as well.

Teene snorted, pointing Kairi to a spot on the grimmest looking of the rugs. She took a moment to compose herself before speaking up, gesturing at the foreigner with a lazy gesture of her delicate hand. "He's Hiroto Tohsaka."

The empty patch of ground in between all three rumbled, and a small onyx table rose. At the center of the table stood a bronze pot, its bottom glowing red with contact with the table. Teene reached behind her, taking out a lumpy looking and chipped ceramic bowl for herself.

Kairi blushed, and coughed as he looked away as she happily served herself a drink. Hiroto merely raised an eyebrow, silently taking in the duo.

"Kairi Shishigou." He introduced himself.

Still, what a trio they made. It was practically a joke that was being writing itself out. A little brown girl in a sun dress, a japanese man in a maroon dress suit, and a biker walk into a bar. Kairi's master certainly had enough liquor stored around for this place to count as one.

Teene sighed in pleasure, cheeks flushed as she lowered the large bowl. "So, what the hell do you want, Shishi?"

Kairi frowned, glancing at Hiroto.

"Oh, that old man is fine. He'll just watch, I promise." She dismissed the graying man with a slight belch, "Isn't that right, Hiroto?"

The man twitched at the familiar name, but nodded.

"I wish you'd stop being so damn creepy, old lady." Kairi scowled at her, making Teene grin back. "This is why I never visit."

Teene pouted.

"Anyway," Kairi continued, ignoring the wounded look she gave him. "I need you to look at this. Then tell me what method of soul maiming I need to do to get rid of it."

He thrust his arm out.

"That's...!" Hiroto gasped, sitting up in alarm. Teene's frigid look made the man wince and sit back down.

"Well, what a fine mess you've gotten yourself into, Shishi." Teene said. Her expression, normally so haughty, actually turned serious as she crawled off her spot and towards him. "No wonder I accidentally chipped your bowl."

Kairi nodded, too surprised to speak.

The girl took his larger hand in both of hers. Magic entered her eyes, making the iris lighten, as she observed the stigmata. Seemingly unsatisfied, she took his hand in both of hers and began to twist it from side to side.

"...I'm truly sorry. There's nothing we can do now." Teene finally declared, gently letting go of his hand. Her true age made itself apparent as she stiffly moved to lean back into the spot she occupied previously.

"What?" Kairi exploded, slamming his hands onto the ground. It flinched away from his fists, causing him to lean over the smaller girl. "Why the hell not, Master? Everyone knows you're a goddamned monster, but you can't help me laser this goddamned ink off my hand?!"

"That stigmata has bound itself too tightly your soul. The power that granted it is beyond any mortal, Shishi. You have to complete the Heaven's Fall ritual, or take as many of your enemies as you can while you die."

Kairi cursed.

Teene silently gazed at him, letting him vent. He was about to continue, but she reached over and lightly tapped him on the head.

"Stop misbehaving. That isn't the face of someone that studied under me." She commanded, almost in a motherly tone of voice. "Who we are when we're about to face death says more about us than at any other time. Don't make me regret taking you in."

Kairi trembled in disbelief, but Hiroto interrupted him before he could retort.

"It isn't hopeless." Hiroto began, drawing Kairi's gaze. The man looked sympathetic as he continued. "You could summon a Heroic Spirit if you could get to a catalyst before Yggdramillenia's forces arrive. In fact, I came to-"

The biker's laugh was painful to hear, edged with hysteria.

"Who are you shitting, old man?" Kairi's hands tightened into fists. "Yggdramillenia spread those things to the dark corners of the world, it's impossible to find one before their forces get here!"

Hiroto didn't seem particularly moved. "Then escape them and find one. You're her student, so it should be-"

That was the last straw.

Kairi roared as he threw himself at Hiroto Tohsaka, rushing him down like a stampeding elephant.

"What." Hiroto's legs flexed beneath him.

Kairi's wild swing completely missed his stationary target. The biker's feet immediately tripped up, getting tangled on part of the rug that had suddenly bunched up.

"Are." The older man sprang up, grabbing Kairi's shoulder.

"You." Hiroto lightly tapped the back of Kairi's leg, sending the leg flying upwards. Hiroto then pulled the biker down towards the ground with surprising strength.

"Doing?" The older man asked, smashing Kairi into the ground simultaneously.

The younger man's head rang with pain as he drunkenly stared up at Hiroto in confusion and shock. Kairi's attempt at rising was easily rebuffed by the older man's single hand, which pressed him down.

It had taken less than two seconds.

"Well, so have you both cooled your heads of your ape-like aggression." Teene said, sneering at both men. "Or should I get a woman for you both to violate next?"

The biker blanched and quickly shook his head.

She'd do it in a heartbeat too, the devil.

Hiroto blushed, letting go of Kairi. "I've brought fighting into your home, Teene. My apologies." The older man reached down, offering Kairi a hand. Once both of them were up on their feet, he bowed towards Kairi.

"I'm sorry."

"I-it's fine."

Teene clapped her hands sarcastically. "Great, we've all made a new friend today. So, let's review." Her enraged gaze focused on Kairi, making him gulp. "You, are an idiot. One that I should probably mute."

She pointed over at Hiroto. "You are too old for being a hothead. If you get a heart attack and die on me, I'll make sure to bind your soul to a damn Pez dispenser for the rest of eternity." The Japanese man nervously laughed, rubbing at his arm.

Teene finally pointed at herself.

"Me, way too soft on you, Shishi." She sighed, glancing over at Hiroto. "Show him what you were here for, Hiroto."

Kairi blinked, looking over at Hiroto. The man was looking positively chipper as he reached for his right glove. Pulling it off, he revealed...

"...no way." Kairi stared at the faded Command Seal. He looked up at Hiroto in shock. "You...you beat Yggdramillenia?"

Hiroto grimaced, shaking his head. "No, I was a Master of the Heaven's Feel ritual that came before. Well, before this mockery that currently exists." He paused, lost in thought for a few moments. Taking in Kairi's confusion, he continued. "My homeland is where the One Grail was originally created. My family, along with two other families of magi, fought for it for several hundred years."

"But, what happened?"

"Yggdramillenia stole it beneath our noses." Hiroto looked disgusted at admitting it. "We were all fools. Using the technology of the Third Reich's Last Battalion, they took it and perverted it to their own ends. Even mocked us all by renaming it 'Heaven's Fall'." He looked just about ready to spit as he finished.

Kairi nodded, remembering his own history lessons. From there, Yggdramillenia had gone on to annihilate their own side before turning on the savage lands to the west. It hadn't ended well, to say the least. Now they were basically the dagger behind the rulers of Europe.

"So, what are you doing here, old timer?" Kairi asked, wanting to get it straight. He glanced over at the slip of a girl, making her glance away. And what was she up to, the last statement sounded strange.

"I'm here to offer you, one of the Masters of the Grail War, my services." Hiroto held his fingers slightly apart. "For a mild fee, I will get you to the catalyst which best fits you. Satisfaction guaranteed or your money back."

Kairi gaped.

"So, what's your life worth, stranger?" Hiroto asked with tiny smile, twisting his mustache a little.

* * *

It was late in the afternoon when Kairi and Teene left her workshop. With the boundary field down, her tent was standing at the end of a dead end alley, sealed off from the auction house by a false brick wall that Clocktower had set up.

Up ahead, Hiroto Tohsaka was gazing at a bronze sphere with rapture, rolling it between his hands. An umbrella rested on the crook of his arm, bouncing around with his motions. Practically acting like a cat that had gotten the canary and the creme.

"I can't believe that son of a b-"

"The price was paid. It is now set in stone." Teene responded, tone of voice cool. She glanced over at him, forcing her will on Kairi. The biker frowned back at her. "A Tohsaka will never betray you, Shishi."

"That fond of him, huh?"

"Ah, so you're jealous after all."

"Am not!"

"Perhaps giving away the Hydra was worth it." Teene giggled, malevolent glee apparent on her face.

"I-I'll pay you back, I swear I will."

"Mm." Teene kept her own council, one last enigmatic smile on her features as she turned back to her tent. Before she entered, she paused and called back. "Take care of Shishi, will you Hiroto?"

"Of course! I swear on my honor as a gentleman of the House Tohsaka." Hiroto snapped to attention. The bronze sphere was slipped into a pocket of his jacket. "I will wholeheartedly provide jolly cooperation!"

"I can't believe you can spout such nonsense after doing that." Kairi said, feeling sick. He flashed Hiroto a scowl. "What kind of gentleman does that?!"

"Now now," Hiroto wagged a finger, catching the expression. "Don't get upset. It is not up to us to question the whys of the world."

"I'm not questioning it, I'm questioning you!"

"Well, glad to see you're both going to be the best of friends." Teene laughed, entering the tent. She briefly poked her head out a few moments later. The goodwill was totally gone. "Please on off my property!"

The wind howled.

Both men screamed as they were picked up and flung away. Their figures flew over the auction site, and towards another side of the pier.

"Now I remember why I never visit!" Kairi shouted, flailing his arms uselessly. At the apex of their flight, Hiroto quickly grabbed onto Kairi, making him jerk and try to slap the old man's arm away. "The hell are you doing?!"

Hiroto let his actions answer. A cascade of colors flashed as he popped open his umbrella. Kairi blinked as magical energy flared from within, arresting their motion as they gently began to bob down towards the west.

"You...have a magical umbrella."

"Yes." Hiroto proudly smiled. "My finest work indeed."

Kairi considered, and simply acknowledged it with a nod.

'Jolly cooperation indeed.'

Okay, maybe this partnership might work out.

"So, where to first?" Kairi asked, grabbing onto Hiroto's arm to steady himself. "You said you know where a catalyst could be found, right?"

"Correct." The man adjusted his hold on the umbrella, sending them soaring to the left, just barely missing some power cords. "First, we'll have to secure ourselves a vehicle. It is on an island."

"So, we need a boat, huh?" Kairi mused. "Did you bring one with you?" He hopefully asked.

Hiroto shook his head.

"So what are we going to do?" Kairi demanded.

Hiroto simply pointed. Far below, arrayed in their individual docks, were various boats. One in particular, which was furthest from the lot, didn't seem to have anyone watching after it.

"Are you... serious?"

"That one will do." Hiroto said with a sly smile, eyes twinkling with delight. "It will be proud to serve as House Tohsaka's ship, if only briefly."

"Hah, you're pretty shady, old timer." Kairi grinned, feeling fired up. "Yeah, let's go and steal that ship, then!"

"It isn't stealing," Hiroto began, finding himself turning towards the east. "It is annex-" He cut himself off with a sharp inhalation.

"Kairi, look!"

"What-?"

Moments later, Kairi feeling his right hand throbbing in pain, hissing at the sensation. Listening to Hiroto, Kairi glanced in the same direction. A metallic juggernaut was rising from the horizon. With smoke and flame bellowing out of it, the dark airship was unlike any of the European Union's sleek ones.

It was a war machine.

"Yggdramillenia."

Both men sharply descended to the boat, Kairi assuming that the old mercenary was foregoing a gentle landing. He was completely fine with it, though. They rolled as they crashed onto the wooden deck of the boat, making a commotion.

"Move it, Shishigou-san!"

"I'm trying!"

Untangling themselves from the ropes holding the sails, both men sprang up. Hiroto quickly pointed Kairi towards the side of the boat away from the dock.

"I'll start up the engines. Hurry, you untie the boat! After you do that, I need you to find me up top!" Hiroto gave the marching orders, rushing up a set of stairs off to the side, moving upwards to where he needed to go.

Kairi ran towards the anchor.

* * *

"Iiiit's time yet again, kids!" The female clown on the television cheerfully smiled at them. Various suited actors in animal costumes danced behind her, the painted background of a restaurant bright, and filled with props. Young children in the audience cheered, and their parents clapped as the redhead danced the ring she was standing in, kicking up dust. "Say it with me!"

"It's...!" One of the mascots, a beaver with a toupe, bound over the counter. In its hands was a fancy looking, if plastic, looking cup.

"...Holy Grail...!" The beaver waved the cup, which thanks to CGI, began to glow with a golden sheen.

"...Time!" The animal mascots pumped their fists in the air, causing the cheers to double. Behind them, a large monitor began to lower, flickering to life as it showed an airborne view of a city. The sides were blurring as it rapidly descended, orienting itself towards a specific boat.

"With Lanru and all her pals." The clown smiled at the crowd, eyes bright as she held up the microphone. The camera focused on a pair of men scrambling along the ship. "Wow, what a weird duo! It seems that the challenger this time is Kairi Shishigou!"

A smaller image of the biker appeared to boos. The clown wagged her finger at them, lowering her microphone briefly as a skunk walked up to her. She exchanged it for a small box-like set of controls.

"Now, now, don't be mean." She pouted at them. "Kairi doesn't have many friends. In fact, Hiroto Tohsaka may be the first friend that he's made in five years!"

The crowd oohed and aaahed in sympathy.

Lanru's painted smile stretched wide across her face.

"But how long will he stay living? Will he join Kairi's ever growing list of dead friends shortly?"  
The studio was drenched in red light. Crosshairs appeared over the monitor to whoops and shouts.

"Stay tuned to find out!"

* * *

In better times, Kairi had once crossed the Great Barrier Reef on water scooter - a feat that was somewhere between sledding and motorcycling, but involved a certain probability of drowning.

This was like that, but not.

One, the yacht was quite a bit larger than a personal watercraft, and two, it hadn't been raining giant balls of fire the summer he spent in Australia.

The waters were choppy enough that every two or three seconds, the yacht briefly simulated the sensation of freefall as it cut forward through the bay - tossing the objects on the deck astray. Horito's umbrella danced amongst the flying debris, adding another element of chaos as it whipped the winds up in a flurry, straining the sails that had been thankfully deployed before they liberated the boat.

The older magus spun the wheel with a flourish, sending them skidding across the sea.

"You're having way too much fun with this, old timer."

Another fireball punctuated Kairi's comment, causing a spray of water to flood the surface of the deck. He threw himself to the ground, and pulled Hiroto down by the lapel a second later, when the massive windshield on the bridge exploded inwards from another near miss.

"Of course not," The graying mercenary had the good grace to look a bit a bit embarrassed, looking at him after they pulled themselves back to their feet. He quickly took control of the yacht once again. "All business, lad! Still, I'd rather not have a beauty like this get ruined..."

Kairi caught on right away.

A glance out through the shattered window on the exit of the cabin showed the airship was dangerously close to them. The behemoth was practically skimming the surface of the bay, and some measure of self preservation kept them from dipping the last few feet. Whatever cannons that war machine could afford to aim at them were going full burst. The constant volleys of fireballs barely missing them - causing pillars of water to erupt across the surface of the bay.

"We're going to need a bigger gun." He responded, turning back towards Hiroto.

"You're a necromancer, right?" Tohsaka briefly glanced over, eyes grave. "Summon up some help!"

"And do what? The spirits I know wouldn't be enough."

Hiroto reached into his jacket. The bronze sphere Teene had given the older man went flying towards Kairi.

"Then you can borrow one that can stop them."

Kairi glanced up from the sphere in his hands, startled by the man's claim. The surprise slowly turned into a confident smirk.

* * *

Kairi's stepped out onto the deck of the bridge, securing the bronze sphere to his body.

"Bring that back, would you?" Hiroto asked, keeping a stiff expression. It was pretty hard to miss the undercurrent of anxiety in his voice when he added an aside. "I would certainly like to avoid dropping trough, lad."

"I'll make sure the dignity of the Tohsaka lineage is preserved, old timer." Kairi plucked his sunglasses off his face, folding them and placing them inside his jacket.

Conditions outside of the cabin were harsher than expected.

The necromancer began to violently cough. He tried and failed to catch his breath, but every bit of breath was a struggle. It was like the goddamned fey were stealing his air from his lungs. The chilling wind, lapping at his hands and face, weren't helping matters.

"Careful, I'm easing the pressure." Hiroto Tohsaka's voice called out. It had an ethereal quality to it, explaining how the man had managed to communicate with him. "Take deep breaths now. Then move."

Kairi did as instructed, waited an extra moment, and then moved.

It was harder than it sounded. Hiroto hadn't told him that it'd feel like his entire body would be as heavy as lead outside. Simple locomotion was almost beyond him, requiring him to lean forwards before stepping.

The winds were playing havoc with him.

Since he was having to practically fight the wind, there were times it treacherously would give way or try and tug at him more than he expected, sending him spinning or stumbling. Kairi's only recourse was to sway his arms around rapidly to try and reorient himself, constantly shifting and fighting the winds to keep his center of gravity.

Coming up to the stairs was half the battle.

The man grunted as his pinkie smashed against the side of the railing. He ignored the throbbing, grabbing hold of it and using it to guide himself down the steps towards the bridge. Each step felt strange, a disconnect between his heavy boots clapping into the ground and utter silence to his ears.

He was almost down when he heard a strange groaning.

Followed by a flash of light.

The entire boat shook. Hiroto shouted a warning when a piece of the bridge's railing snapped off and flew towards Kairi's face. Shoving it to the back of his mind, Kairi pushed against the railing, and threw himself down.

Wood shattered above his head, raining chunks of sawdust and splinters as it punched a hole in wall, but he was too busy getting his entire body pummeled by several blows as he rolled downstairs.

"You have to move." Hiroto sounded tense, "We've sprung a leak. And we can't afford another hit."

A shaky glance to the side showed they were missing part of the bridge. Kairi briefly stared, groaning as water fell down on him. The source of the impromptu shower, a large waterspout, was vanishing.

"I'm ready." Kairi breathed, getting to his feet. His body throbbed in pain with the motion, but he ignored it. Not the best condition he could have hoped for, but he had come out of it better than he would've otherwise been.

The knot holding the treasure was released, causing it to tumble into his waiting hands. Several of the studs along the surface of the sphere began to burn into Kairi's hand. His prana began to steadily flow within the sphere.

Nature began to reassert itself as the sphere began to glow.

"Great, lad. Then roll the dice, and let it all ride." Hiroto's voice sounded strained. Not only was his mental magecraft beginning to fade, but the winds around them began to die down. The walls surrounding their ship began to collapse, unable to maintain their existence. As they fell, their assassins were revealed.

Bloodlust, and an incredible urge to kill, could be felt practically billowing out of the airship along with the smoke and flames. It was practically on top of them; the shadows it was casting would have blotted out the light if it wasn't for the shining treasure in his hands.

Kairi raised the sphere towards their approaching death.

"Final roll," Kairi said, sneering. "Calling it."

The sphere twisted in his hands, large portions of the material sliding away. Cold air, so frigid to freeze a man's blood, flowed out of the sphere and billowed outwards. Kairi lost all sensation in his hands.

Sealed within the sphere was a well preserved Hydra fetus. It's slender body was coiled around itself in death. Its dark, scaly body protected by the ravages of the world and time by a greenish-blue, crystalline material.

It was an undeniable fact that everything came with an expiration death. The soul wasn't external. This was the one thing that led to necromancers tending to lean towards the nihilistic side of philosophy, but not Kairi.

Kairi knew that life mattered, because it was not forgotten.

A being's time of death was the most profound moment of existence. Once you died, your existence, everything that made you 'you' spread far and wide, dispersing and causing ripples in existence as the soul, the essence of a being, was returned to the great Cycle.

For a normal being, this ripple quickly faded into the background noise of reality.

Beings of great power or influence, being important to existence in some way, were not so quickly snuffed out, and their memory could still be felt in the world long after their passing. It was a distorted attachment to reality, something created by others.

That's what was called Legend.

Within the hands of a Necromancer, a catalyst from the dead would allow you to manipulate the soul to your liking once the ripple was reinforced, and the only payment you had to make was to maintain it.

"Snake Eyes." A flash of green flaring from behind the corpse's closed eyes.

Kairi allowed the Hydra to rampage, losing consciousness as he allowed it to work through him to assert its will.

* * *

The sea bulged, erupting in a geyser of water which halted the cannon fire of the airship. This wall was huge, large enough for multiple yachts to fit inside, and still have room for more. Yet the airship continued on its suicidal dive towards it, trying to crash through it to get at the slowly sinking vessel on the other side.

The shadowy outline which appeared within the depths of the water put a stop to that.

Several scaly limbs laden with seaweed erupted from within the water. They swayed in the air for a few moments, almost like they were tasting the air, and then immediately lashed towards Yggdramillenia.

Explosive blasts and machine gun fire from the airship ripped apart the barnacle covered limbs, but two more seemed to sprout up out of nowhere.

The ends of the limbs suddenly split. Mouths filled with sharp teeth formed, emitting high pitched clicking as they slammed into the airship. Their fangs punched holes holes in the balloon keeping the airship aloft. Flames erupted out from the balloon as it was punctured, driving out the limbs attacking it, but they simply tried to wrap themselves around the balloon, spreading the flame as they squeezed.

Others slammed into the airship itself, ripping out armaments or denting the heavy armor that composed the body of the vessel.

The airship, having lost too much altitude, came to a crash in a spectacular splash of water. Several of the limbs continued to pummel the vessel, the blows echoing through the bay. Crowds of people, gathering at the edges of the piers, could only watch in amazement as the monster tore it apart.

No one noticed the small boat speeding away from the sinking yacht. Their attention was focused on the walls of collapsing water, revealing a luminiscient, squirming mass of limbs for a brief moment. It vanished before them like a dessert mirage, the eyes of anyone looking upon it hurting in that brief moment.

* * *

The small building in front of them seemed like an anti-climatic end for their trip. With a laundromat to one side, and a music store to the other, Kairi glanced over at Hiroto, disbelief in his eyes.

Hiroto nodded.

The necromancer grimaced, and moved towards the 'London Museum of History' with a surly step. He ignored the owl pictures stuck on the large windows on both sides of the wooden door in front of him Their declarations that 'History was a Hoot' rolled off his back.

An index finger was pulled out from one of the water proof pockets in his jacket.

"Hey, Jason, I need your help." The call was casually made, visibly surprising Hiroto when a featureless face with sunken eyes appeared in the reflection of the windows.

"Kairi...?" The man's voice was thin, almost hollow. However, more energy began to enter the man's voice as he continued. "You already did it? Damn, you are fast."

"Sorry man, I haven't been able to find Sheila yet." The necromancer sighed. He held up his Command Seals. Simultaneously, he shared a few of his surface memories. "I got dragged into some stupid shit."

"Oh, that sucks." A pause. With what sounded like great deliberation, Jason continued. "I can wait a little longer. I guess."

"Thanks. I appreciate it." Kairi flashed him a grin, gesturing at the door. "Do you think you could...?"

Jason snorted, making Hiroto stare in mild surprise.

"That's easy." There was a click, the door swinging open. "Anything else?"

"Can you check for an alarm?"

Jason's face vanished, the presence moving into the building.

"I wasn't expecting that." Hiroto piped up, drawing up to Kairi. The necromancer glanced over at the Japanese man with a raised eyebrow. "I thought for sure you would have destroyed that door."

"You sure don't hold back, do you?" Kairi asked, smirking.

"Mm."

Kairi snorted in amusement. What did the man think? The hydra had been solely a one time thing.

"Jason was a thief." The biker told his companion. "I dislike having to use brute force on everything. Unlike a certain mercenary I know."

Hiroto blinked, pretending to look around in confusion.

"It's clear. It was a cheap alarm system, but it called someone over. You guys got maybe five minutes left. Grab what you want and run, guys." Jason's voice came back. In the time he had been gone, the featureless ghost had gained sharp brown eyes and chubby cheeks. "Don't get yourself killed, Kairi. I still want to see her get hers for what she put me through, alright?"

"Please, who do you think you're talking to?"

Jason smiled with relief as he faded.

"I'll lead the way. The owner of this establishment recently bought a crate of goods at a certain auction. I don't think he had time to sort it all out, so it should still be in the back." Hiroto pushed through into the room, followed shortly by Kairi. Several small display cases were walked past, ignored by the two men as unimportant trash.

"How do you know that?" Kairi asked, a touch of suspicion in his voice. Only Teene's words were keeping it at that level.

"I sold it to him at a very reasonable price." Hiroto didn't exactly make things any easier on him when he casually responded. The foreigner seemed to have enough presence of mind to continue in an assuring voice. "The ties between my land and the Grail are still strong, even today. They grant me a certain level to predict where the next battle would happen. Ah, there we are!"

The door barring their way deeper into the shop was lightly poked by Tohsaka's umbrella. Kairi closed his eyes as a backlash of wind fluttered his bangs. Moments later, the metal door crashed into the ground, bent around the middle.

"And you said I'm the aggressive one!" Kairi complained, drawing a chuckle from Hiroto. The men strode past the door, with the necromancer hanging back when he noticed the small size of the storage room.

Hiroto closed his eyes, lightly spinning in place with a finger extended.

"There!" He stopped, pointing off to the side.

"What a reassuring way of divining the location." Kairi sarcastically stated, but was ignored as Hiroto eagerly grasped onto the top of the crate. With another surprising show of force, the older man easily ripped the top of the crate off, and lightly tossed it over to the side.

"Oh no, it wasn't divination." The Tohsaka man responded, digging into the box, grunting as he moved things around. Moments later, he grinned, pulling out a beautifully carved chest. It looked like a lot of care had gone into creating it. "This box has been in my family for ages. I can recognize it easily."

Well, that certainly looked important enough to be a catalyst.

"Is that it?" Kairi wondered.

"Heaven's no!" Hiroto laughed it off. "It's store inside. The blackhole kept it preserved all this time."

"Y-you...have a blackhole?" Kairi stared at the proud man, horror writ large on his face. "In that box?!"

Hiroto quirked his head, looking confused. "Yes, how else is it going to be able to access other universes? If you happen to know another way, my good lad, I could marry you to my granddaughter right away!" He said something utterly outrageous with a straight face, stunning Kairi.

"Pass." Kairi shook his head.

"Your loss." Hiroto undid the locks on the box, making Kairi flinch for each one undone. "Now then, give me one moment, alright?"

Then he jumped inside the trunk, his entire body vanishing into the depths of the chest. Kairi accidentally let out a yelp of concern.

"What?" Hiroto's head popped up, wildly looking around. The necromancer froze, arm still outstretched towards him. "What is it, boy?"

Kairi woodenly shook his head.

"Quite alright, then! I'll be back in a jiffy." Hiroto smiled as he acknowledged the necromancer, then stuck his head back inside. Just when Kairi was starting to grow concerned again, the man practically flew out from within the chest. A gust of wind slammed the top shut, allowing Hiroto to land on top of it.

In one arm he held a folded maroon and gold cloth, which was heavily wrinkled. Hiroto stepped off the chest, lightly landing on the ground. Unfolding the cloth, Kairi could see several small tears throughout the material, which had been mended at some point or other.

"There we go!" The older man caught onto the younger's strained look. "Really, this is it. We are finally ready." Hiroto confirmed, pushing the chest aside so Kairi could squeeze his way inside.

"I...don't see anything." Kairi's confusion caused Hiroto to sigh, reach towards the taller man's hand, and pulling him down.

"It's here, see?"

"No. I don't. You better not tell me we're going to summon the King from the Emperor's New Clothes."

"House Tohsaka does not approve of such vulgar tales. The catalyst that you shall use is mighty, and appropriate for one such as yourself."

Soon, they were squatting closer to the ground. The necromancer's eyes finally caught a chunk of gold amongst the maroon portion of the fabric.

Kairi lightly reached towards it, poking at the piece of wood that had almost blended into the rest of the carpet.

"...are you messing with me, old man?" Kairi glared over at Hiroto, sneering.

"Control yourself." Hiroto sighed, shaking his head. He gently, almost reverently, picked up the piece of wood. "This is a piece of the Round Table. Some of the greatest Heroes of the Age of Man are tied to this catalyst."

Kairi practically swayed on the spot, staring at the tiny piece of wood like it had turned into a viper.

"Yes, this was once part of something much larger. Much greater." Hiroto's eyes dimmed as he spoke. "Then it was ruined. Lost forever."

'What are you thinking, old man?' Kairi wondered, seeing the man's energy leave him for the first time. That didn't happen because of some long lost legend. That was a special kind of look. 'Or who are you thinking about.'

Kairi glanced back at the cloth, noting its heavy use in the back of his mind.

"So..." Kairi called out. "Let's call ourselves a legendary Knight."

* * *

The carpet that Hiroto had brought with him pulsed with magic when Kairi activated his circuits. Lines of light began to form on the fabric, swiftly rolling across the surface.

"You came prepared." Kairi mused, and getting a silent nod from Hiroto. "That's handy." He didn't say anything more.

Work that would've taken hours was done in less than a minute.

"I'm going to keep an eye out." Hiroto excused himself. He explained himself as he exited the storage room. "This is an important event. I don't want to ruin the sanctity of the ritual. "

"And we won't all fit in here."

"That too." The Tohsaka acknowledged as an aside. "Just do what feels natural. The ritual will respond to you."

Kairi blinked, turning back towards the carpet. The longer he stared, the more he became sure of the words that he had to say. It was just natural.

"Let silver and steel be the essence. Let stone and the archduke of contracts be the foundation.  
Let red be the color I pay tribute to..."

He was halfway through the aria when he realized something.

It was hard to tell, especially when he was standing in the field of the formalcraft circle, but he could feel something channeling itself through him without his consent.

As a necromancer, that pissed him rightly the fuck off.

"Motherfucker," Kairi stopped his chanting, causing the air to freeze. The circle dimmed as Kairi threw his will behind another metaphysical blow, pushing back the influence. "I'm no one's puppet!"

A sense of confusion filled him.

He gave it another metaphysical slap. There was no possible way that the overwhelming presence really felt threatened, but it still receded, feeling like a confused puppy.

A proud laugh, full of cheer, filled the storage.

"Ah, I think you hurt her feelings." The knight guffawed, voice echoing inside his armor. Kairi took in a short figure clad in silver armor. A horned helmet, along with crimson accessories, kept the figure from looking monotonous. "Still, women shouldn't assume they can butt into the affairs of men, am I right?"

Kairi couldn't find it in him to respond.

At the moment, the knight seemed to be missing the majority of its body.

"Oh, this?" The figure asked, sounding uninterested. "Be a good summoner and finish the ritual, eh?"

Kairi weakly laughed, throwing his own magic into the ritual.

"Spirit, if your lust can be quenched by the bounty of the earth, please respond!"

The torso rose, prana gathering as it began to shape its lower extremities.

"If your goal lies in the land of the living, speak your name."

The figure in the circle paused for a moment, and then continued.

"You may call me Mordred." The spirit's form became more defined. "Son of Arthur Pendragon."

Kairi sucked in his breath. This wasn't expected at all. It was with much more care that he continued.

"Mordred, what do you seek."

"I seek the Holy Grail."

Magical energy began to peak, the last opportunity Kairi had to banish the spirit.

"Enter a contract with me, and become my guardian." The necromancer pressed forwards. It was do or die now. "By the rule of balance, I will pledge myself to help you attain your goal."

Mordred's body levitated, arms forming in a flash. He floated forwards, holding an arm out towards Kairi.

"I agree. I shall be your sword from this day forth."

"Please to be working with you." Kairi took a hold of Mordred's arm, and gave it a firm shake.

With that, their contract fully formed. Prana surged out of him, and into Mordred, finalizing the latter's tie to the mortal world again.

Then something outrageous happened.

Surprised, the necromancer stepped back, still holding onto the knight's arm. But they had...collapsed on themselves. Or so it seemed from their point of view. Mordred was practically on the tip of his toes to grasp Kairi's hand at the level they were shaking at before.

"You're short." The necromancer found himself accusing the knight, feeling confused. "Did I screw up?"

The Hero before him reared back, letting go of Kairi's hand. It was almost like Kairi's words had been a physical blow.

"Not short, compact!" The figured shouted back. "It allows me to sneak beneath my enemy's guard to strike at their vitals!"

"Oh, so you're a midget." Kairi mumbled, feeling a bit disappointed. "I guess it's true. People were shorter in the past."

"M-midget?! I am no sideshow attraction!" Mordred hissed, temperature dropping. "I am a proud Knight of Camelot, you knave!"

Hiroto Tohsaka, dragging the limp form of a guard, came back on this line. "Are you two done yet? You two can bond more when we leave...the...city?" The older man drew to a stop as he saw the necromancer and the Saber class he had summoned were waving their hands at each other, angrily shouting.

"You!" The knight, Saber, pointed towards Hiroto with desperate energy. "I ask, are you my Master? Please, please, please be my Master."

Kairi studiously ignored the two, stepping past the two of them after picking up Hiroto's tools.

"I know it'll be hard, but please try to keep up." The necromancer made a point to stretch out his longer legs as he walked away.

"G-get back here!" Saber followed after Kairi angrily. "We're not done with our conversation!"

Hiroto blinked, feeling lost. Realizing he was being left behind, he dropped the guard, and rushed after them.

"Hey! Where do you think you two are going?! Wait for me!"

* * *

The blinking of helicopters shone amongst the skies, highlighted amongst the sky by the glow of industrial flood lights.

Already the city was desperately trying to salvage anything they could on behalf of Yggdramillenia. Desperate attempts to appease their masters by showing that they hadn't allowed equipment to be damaged more than it had to be.

Wenches extracted several containers. Despite being made of metal, each of them had several rips throughout, which flooded out water. Worried about any potential damage, the technicians moved to open them once they were on dry land.

Several drowned corpses flopped out, the white military outfits of Yggdamillenia clinging onto their strangely svelte bodies.

* * *

Several miles away, a man in rusted armor exited the bay. His hair was matted to his body, and his armor showed a few cracks on it, but his relentless pace didn't slow down.

In his arms, he tightly gripped a thick cord, the line running over his shoulder and into the depths of the bay.

It tightened, and a large metal container followed him out of the bay moments later. Sparks danced across the concrete ground as the container was dragged behind the man. He briefly paused, taking in his surroundings.

Nearby, he could see a waterlogged speedboat. The soaked man narrowed his eyes, sensing the mana still clinging to the vehicle. With an application of will, the man extended his senses as far as he could.

A furnace of magical energy, steadily feed him, burst into existence within the container. Another source of power, an enemy, was steadily feeding power into another being. Both of them were quickly approaching.

A wicked smile appeared on his face.

With a thought, his faithful blade appeared at his side.


	3. Chapter 3

The corpse of the dirigible plucked out of the skies by Kairi and Hiroto's summon bled oil freely into the bay. A stray spark from its harsh landing had ignited it at one point, and now an inferno inferno oozed along the surface of the bay. Secondary explosions were going off inside the airship from pierced fuel lines. What little was still above the waves was slowly being claimed by the merciless tides.

A single man marched away far from the roving spotlights shining on the airship.

His silver-clad figure carried a punishing pace, long spindly legs digging furrows through the mud. His exertions caused muck to drift around, mixing into his full bodied hair. The comet-like tail floating freely behind him refused to be stained, though.

'Magi,' Pitiless eyes shone within a gaunt face. 'You have stepped too far beyond the line.'

A heavy corded chain, wrapped several times over his arm, dragged a man sized oblong shaped sphere through the muck clinging onto the bottom of the bay. The sheer pressure of the water all around them should have crushed them like a tin can, but a fierce light shone from within the container. Energy curled up the length the chain like a snake, sinking into his arm.

The figure started moving faster, motions coming to him easier.

Water swirled before him, finally parting as he began his ascent.

"I will bleed you out thrice." He reached for the blade holster on his back. "Once for daring to raise a hand towards me, once for having the cowardice to flee, and the last for..."

His hungry grin revealed sharp teeth.

"Taking what was rightfully mine."

* * *

Type Moon, cures all fungal infections, just one application! Type Moon is wholly owned and operated by Type Moon (tm). All additional references belong to their respective companies.

02 - Skin Deep

* * *

Siegfried.

A name revered amongst dragon slayers.

Siegfried.

A hero that would go down in history as the greatest of Europe's swordsmen.

Siegfried.

The name of a fool that died well before his time, victim to events far beyond his control, slaughtered by lesser men who coveted everything he held.

Siegfried.

His life was steeped in Greed. The actions that made him great were in service of greedy men and women. The same that would turn and slaughter him, coveting everything he earned in his life. But it was fine - they could not help it. Their lusts had gone rampant, unchecked.

Siegfried.

Nothing but a tool.

But were tools also not highly valued in their own right?

Were they not taken care of if they performed above and beyond their station?

He had taken the gold of Fafnir.

He had wed into royalty.

He had the love of a goddess.

He died with everything a mortal could ever want.

Simply by doing what was expected and accepting that the world was filled with greedy creatures.

Siegfried.

A selfless hero.

...Or at least one with the appearance of such.

What was the difference of a new Master?

What was the difference of a new era?

Greed still existed, and Siegfried would thrive because he understood it.

Just as well as the back of his own hand...

* * *

For decades, the Yggdrasil's iron grasp over Europe has remained absolute.

Generations were born in a regime that controls everything they watch, breath, and eat. Elementary children sit in front of televisions featuring state sponsored shows. Lanru and Friends sang songs about the slaughter of the American Tribals in the morning. Kids laugh at the silly bug eyed brown puppets getting hit by Lanru's clubs.

During the day, schools encouraged middle schoolers to sign up for internships at the police station. Kids simply roll their eyes as their teachers make a sad attempt at seeming cool - everyone knew the police never killed the sacrifical goats. They just kept idiots out of the line of fire between the purifiers and a sacrifical magic user.

The twelve o'clock news blandly reports the Grail Vessel's daily cleansing of hundreds with clinical detachment.

And the worst thing - the past was buried, not through censorship, but with mockery and apathy.

Perhaps if there were those who still cared, the fate of the histories within the London Museum of History wouldn't merely be to gather dust.

But it was easy to see why this future had come to pass.

It took a fifteen minute ride across a barge to arrive. A terrible draft clung to the visitors. Like a persistent haunting, bringing chills and headaches for anyone unfortunate enough to visit.

The exhibits themselves were in terrible upkeep - an entire wing of the second floor was still cordoned off when a plastic model of a large t-rex had collapsed several months ago. Chintzy Pre-War videos constantly played in the viewing rooms, triumphantly declaring that London would defeat the allied forces of the Nazi, and later Yggdrasil itself as the paramilitary group rose to prominence, and swallowed their parent faction whole as they became Yggdramillenia.

And took over the world.

The museum was threadbare, forgotten, and a total joke. There were many other places like that throughout Europe. Each continued to serve the same purpose - mocking the past and ingraining that lesson in the minds of the future.

But tonight...

Tonight, the London Museum of History was going to actually witness history.

* * *

A noise like thunder boomed just outside the walls of the gift shop of the museum. It was so intense it caused several knickknacks to shake on their displays. Cups rattled and bounced dangerously close to the edges they were packed on, glass gained hairline fractures, and keychains wildly swung on their stands. The wall exploded as a pair of knights simply walked through the wall like it wasn't in their way, too preoccupied with their exchanges of blows to use their occult powers to prevent the wholesale destruction they suddenly brought into the confined space.

A shelf of commemorative plates shattered as the fighter's antiquated swords came together with sounds akin to military cannons. Not even the grim countenance of Winston Churchill (set of a thousand) withstood the force of the wind emitted from their mere passing. Many more celebrities and historical figures were annihilated afterwards.

It was a silent tragedy to plate collectors everywhere.

"Well, live and learn." A male's voice faintly reached the ears of one of the two fighters locked in the midst of several tacky looking kitchen supplies. "Guess I didn't need to go in stealthy this time."

Thatcher brand waffle irons bounced around with aplomb, launched from several shelves as the knights collided against each other, repelling each other towards opposite sides of the room.

"Why don't we give peace a chance?" Asked the alarm metaphorically. "Maybe some biscuits, some tea, just put down the pointy slabs of antiquated machismo until the nice and heavily armed law enforcement arrive?"

No one really cared about the alarm at this point.

The crimson knight finally found a break, as her arm gave way and twisted at a rather queer seventy five degree angle after attempting to parry a heavy blow from her rampaging opponent. Life always provided a silver lining, and as such it was enough to send the smaller knight flying through the same hole that had been created and back towards the rest of the party she had been somewhat unwillingly been drafted into a few minutes ago. Her belly flop was looked upon with varying looks of shock by the two men that were pulling themselves out of their own rubble.

"Are you quite alright, Saber?!" The older asked. "Siegfried always was a right bastard."

The younger man plucked a piece of rebar off her helmet.

"I want a redo." Her Master muttered, looking nonplussed at the casual name drop. "Let's redo our lives up until this point. Shall we begin now? Why didn't you tell me you knew Siegfried, old man?"

Hiroto's eyebrows rose with the question alongside his pointer finger, almost like he was about to pronounce the secrets of the universe.

"It was news to me." His mystique took a serious hit, but at the same time a strange look filled his eyes. "Regrets of my youth..."

An enraged roar cut off any further conversation.

"Master," Mordred grit her teeth as she pressed her arm against a wall. "Get the geriatric to reveal the regrets of his youth before we die." The snapping of her bone back into place punctuated her point.

The knight bounded away.

Hiroto huffed, but a strange look was in his eyes.

"Hitting him harder isn't going to win the day." He mumbled, but sounded a little confused. "Why doesn't the name give her enough information to decide on a plan?"

"What do you mean?"

"The Grail supplies quite a lot of information." The building shook. Probably another horrendous waste of tax payer money was going on right about now. "A name should have been more than enough for Saber to know that Siegfried's weakness is on his back."

Kairi grunted, a bit surprised. Seemed like a pretty outrageous weakness. Then again, the knight he had called seemed larger than life too. Maybe all those ghosts were bigger where it counted.

"Let's get upstairs." Kairi gestured. "Saber will know where we are, and we can stay out of the way."

"Giving up?" Hiroto asked, disappointed.

"Please," The necromancer shook his head. "I have yet begun to fight."

Hiroto smiled like a little boy.

"Relics?"

"Uh huh." Kairi cracked his neck as he marched upstairs. "All on the city's dime."

* * *

A trail of destruction marked the path the Servants had gone, whether through beheaded displays, or furrows carved through the walls and ground.

Swords met once again, glancing against each other in a shower of sparks. Both knights jockeyed for superior footing in the shattered remains of a display of the United State's extinct tribal nations. They stepped over plastic logs, swords aimed at each other as they slowly walked in a half circle.

Mordred snorted, offended at the other fighter's treatment.

"What's wrong, Siegfried?" She said, calling him by the name Hiroto used. "Can't keep up?"

The name didn't mean anything.

There was no whispers of insight from the Grail either.

"You've just been summoned, haven't you?" Siegfried answered, not showing any reaction to her reveal. "Why don't you stand down? My grievances are not with you. It is a terrible thing to die before you can understand."

The knight hopped forwards like a jackrabbit, lashing out with Clarent.

Siegfried's cape fluttered as his blade parried it. The taller knight stepped in and punished the attack. A crushing blow robbed Mordred of a split second of consciousness as he hammered her platemail with nearly enough force to cave it.

Clarent came alight, answering Mordred's will.

Siegfried's arm trembled as bolts of electricity flared into him from the trailing contact of Gram with Clarent. It was his turn to give ground with hurried strides as he warily reassessed Mordred.

"Don't underestimate me." Mordred bared her teeth within her helmet.

Siegfried realized he had misstepped, but outside of a sour look, he simply nodded at his newly created opponent. Whether or not he had nothing to gain by slaughtering the person in front of him mattered not now. He had gone and given the prideful Heroic Soul before him a reason to fight.

'Such is life.' He thought.

The dragon slayer shook off the stinging remaints of the electrical shock and engaged his opponent once again.

* * *

A layer of dust rose as two men pried open the glass display.

Hiroto's eyes eagerly swept through the jewelry set on velvet stands.

"I'm almost ready." The elder told the younger, aware of the expression on Kairi's face.

"Don't tell me that." Kairi agreed, scratching at his temple as he looked over the gems on display with a bored expression. "She's doing a good job of keeping the Yggs' dog off our tail."

The young man nervously laid a hand on the plastic bag tucked into his belt.

A pair of human sized displays on the wall behind him had fist sized holes.

"It is through the providence of Saber that we can do this, yes." Hiroto mused, whatever annoyance he had towards the knight long gone by now. "We have to thank her profusely when we escape."

'I wonder if she would like a hat?' He thought.

"Mmm."

Hiroto looked up, eagerly wrapping a set of beads around his wrist - were those even gemstones, and glancing at him with his loupe and his bare eye.

"I'm not hearing the sound of agreement." The large glass made one of his eyes look like it was bulging, "Thoughts like those have gotten many other people before you killed."

Kairi heard the warning for what it was.

"I don't know Saber yet." Kairi said. "Respect shouldn't be given out freely."

Hiroto grimaced, popping off his loupe and tucking it into his pocket.

Above their heads, the lights suddenly flickered before going off.

Both men traded worried looks.

"It's time to go."

Hiroto eagerly nodded.

"Agreed."

* * *

Siegfried and Mordred's thrusts passed each other by inches. The taller knight threw out his arm and caught Mordred by the throat. Morded let out a grunt of shock, twisting to pierce through Siegfried's chest.

"Poor form." He commented, and threw Mordred away before she could complete the motion.

The female knight was smashed through a bookcase, but she reoriented herself and went back at Siegfried.

Gram and Clarent clashed, the latter eagerly trying to taste blood.

"Screw off." She answered.

Siegfried snorted, and moved his sword around hers, opening her up and twisting hard.

Mordred slammed onto the ground hard, a hollow metallic echo ringing through the entry hall.

"You're letting your emotions get the better of you."

The female knight was getting a sick sense of deja vu from the whole fight as Siegfried leapt over her strike aimed at his feet and promptly kicked her in the side.

Momentum carried her like a ragdoll, her armored figure bouncing almost out the door leading outside.

'This is just like Lancelot.' She remembered the days of training with dread.

The scent of the bay filled her nose, adding to a headache that was beginning to form.

'And he isn't going to shut up this whole time, is he?'

Dazed, Mordred tried to pull herself back to her feet.

"How did you become Saber, again?" Siegfried proved her right.

Her opponent started running towards her, unwilling to let her rise.

Siegfried's eyes flashed, flinty jades shining with an inner light while he thrust his arm towards her. His hair billowed behind him with an invisible force. An equal amount of force animated the door, causing it to swing towards Mordred.

The female knight instinctively tried to go immaterial-

Mordred cursed, feeling the door slam into her empty arm. Alarm briefly clouded her mind, slowing her actions as she tried to pull at her arm. Clarent scrapped at the floor uselessly. The metal around her arm began to protest, warping around it as whatever invisible force Siegfried brought to bear spiked.

"Do you know how to even hold a sword?"

The weight of Clarent immediately transferred towards her empty hand. A heavy sense of resignation descended on Mordred. She clenched her teeth, looking at her trapped arm.

"Well enough."

She brought Clarent up.

A window above Mordred's head shattered.

She looked upwards in surprise, and Kairi and the old man looked downwards in perplexed bemusement.

A pair of humans diving out of it with the aid of thick looking cables. Kairi had both of his arms tightly wrapped around his, pressing his face against it. Hiroto had a smile on his face, an arm supporting a large sack over a shoulder while he kicked his feet to try and gain more air time.

"Master?"

Kairi opened his eyes and looked down.

The necromancer saw her trapped arm, then went up to her other arm that was raised to cut it off, and then he reached for a small sack at his hip.

"No."

The bag was shredded apart from within. White streaks were fired out like bullets. Claw tipped finger bones jabbed into the door, spreading an oily substance onto the surface.

Mordred immediately started flailing.

Shards of bone and foul smelling wood scattered.

Siegfried charged through the remnants of the door, Gram held out in front of him like a lance, extended out to try and punch through Mordred's face as he tried to catch her in mid-retreat.

Mordred swept Clarent out in front of her. The blade shimmered before spewing out an arc of electricity in front of her. Siegfried's charge was unable to stop in time as barreled through into it, spasming as his body locked up in pain.

The small knight grasped Clarent with both hands.

'Who's inept now.' Mordred thought, swinging with her whole body.

An angry red smile shone at them from Siegfried's neck.

Mordred came to a resting stance, lowering Clarent.

"Master, let's move away now." She started to say.

"Saber!"

Mordred started, turning behind her to see what her Master was gesturing towards.

It was reasonable to expect a corpse to fall to the ground.

The situation was anything but normal.

"Oh my god!" Hiroto blurted, fumbling with his sack. He didn't drop his ill gained loot, though. "What happened to you, Siegfried?!"

The dragonslayer took a step forwards.

Mordred moved back.

"Ah, I apologize." Siegfried gurgled, head flopping backwards. "I must reassess your skills."

A pair of golden eyes glared at them from the shadows inside the neck.

"Parasite?" Kairi breathed. "You're just a spiritual body!"

Hiroto's hands shook, but he didn't speak.

"Come." Siegfried's head, nearly decapitated, turned its lips up at Mordred. "Let's have ourselves a little bit of sport, eh?"

The injury flushed with mana. It came alight, fire scorching an angry red welt along the skin. Whatever they had seen was hidden away from their gazes as the fatal injury simply turned into an angry red scar.

"Who are you?" Mordred asked, disturbed at her Master's conclusion. "No, what are you?"

Mordred's opponent refused to answer. He brought Gram to bear, aiming it straight at her heart. A refreshed expression on his face as he spoke.

"Don't think you'll keep that point over me."

Siegfried's strike came at Mordred in slow motion.

Mordred froze as an overwhelming sense of doom locked her in place.

A shot rang out and Siegfried's head jerked back. Blood slowly oozed from an injury that closed itself off a moment later. The moment's distraction was enough to get Mordred well out of his sword range.

Kairi lowered his hand.

"This fight is over!"

She looked over at her Master and then at Siegfried, hesistating and finding her temper boiling at her own reaction. Mordred lowered her head a little and rushed after Kairi, who was following Hiroto's urgent guiding towards a copse in the east. The female knight glanced back over her shoulder, and found her enemy staring eerily at her.

'Siegfried, huh?' She thought, the word still refusing to linger in her mind when she looked at him. 'No, I just can't see it.'

Was there such a thing as a parasite that could control a hero?

* * *

Siegfried didn't give chase at a very high speed, but was quick enough that they could never lose sight of him for long. They had scrambled through the woods and around the back of the museum in a tense chase that had felt like it had lasted hours. Finally they came to their destination.

"We have to get this boat started." Hiroto urged, settling his sack on the back of the boat. The sound of several gems rustling could be heard within it. He fiddled with the bag, glancing at his companions while securing it. "We want to be out of here before he arrives."

"You realize I've seen that, right?" Mordred called back from the dock.

"They aren't yours." Hiroto sniffed. "And we need them more."

"Everything in London is mine."

"Oh, so you'd like to have another go at Siegfried, then?"

Mordred rested a hand against her armored neck, and went silent as she renewed her guard.

Kairi grunted, arm deep in a mass of wires as he sat behind the controls of a boat kept on site for emergencies. Theirs was a wreck, already written off long ago.

"Hand me that gem, Tohsaka." The necromancer blindly thrust an arm out to the older man. "I need a power source, doubt this engine will be fast enough."

"But that..."

Mordred looked over at the older mage, and he felt a tense stare.

"Mmm." Hiroto reached into the sack, reluctantly handing one of the finer specimens. "One second, let me through, I have to channel my mana through it."

'A small loss,' Hiroto tried to console himself. 'The others are better.'

Maybe he'd even believe it later.

Mordred uncrossed her arms, looking around at their surroundings. The dock they had found was tucked behind the museum. It was off a short cliffside, and several cables ran the length of the wooden planks over their heads. A steady hum emanated from a generator puttering in the background. Was it powering the museum?

The female knight walked towards it out of curiousity, laying a hand on it.

It throbbed beneath her gauntlet, and Mordred wet her lips.

No, not quite what provided the energy, but it did connect to the real power source.

"We're going to need a few more minutes," Kairi called over towards Saber, cleaning his hands with a rag. Hiroto had taken his place inside the small boat, letting the necromancer stretch his legs on the small dock. "Is that alright?"

"Hmph." Mordred's fingers tapped on the surface of the gray and blue block in front of her. "Don't bother, I'll be ready for him next time."

"That's fine, then." Kairi accepted her words at face value, leaving his Servant to do whatever she needed. "Let me know if you need a hand."

Mordred hummed, a little surprised.

"Why?" She asked.

"You're not wasting my time." Kairi said, shrugging. "I'll respect you enough to not do the same to you."

"Hm."

"Yes."

Mordred nodded, walking away and following the power cables, strangely enough.

"Amazing conversation." Hiroto looked up, speaking through a teeth clenched screwdriver. "The poets of the past would weep."

Kairi threw the rag at him.

* * *

The engine puttered to life.

"Good work." Kairi let out a sigh he didn't know he had been holding. "Felt like the second longest wait in my life."

Hiroto flashed a thumbs up, already moving towards the back of the boat.

"What was the first?"

The necromancer undid the ropes tying the ship down, bounced down behind the wheel, and started fiddling with the controls.

"Oh, that's when my daughter was born." Kairi adjusted the mirror on the windshield, and got a face full of Hiroto staring at him agog. "What's with that sort of look? I ain't an amoeba. I've got a working set of nuts, y'know."

Hiroto swept the sack he had been babying on and off all night off his lap.

"What do you mean, 'what's wrong?'!" The old man blurted. "That sounds like a very important thing to not pay attention to when you have an entire organization after your head!"

"Eh. She'll be fine." Kairi held up his Command Seals. "She's like her mom in all the ways that matter."

Hiroto blinked.

"Pragmatic and hateful."

SABER, RETURN TO ME.

The power of the Command Seal rang out, and was very promptly answered as Mordred's figure materialized.

On Hiroto's lap.

Explosions began to rage deeper into the island, punctuated by bursts of thunder that screamed in every direction like a demented fireworks display.

A reserved silence descended on the trio. They thought about many things. Like the current socio-economic situation, currents around the bay versus the ability of their boat to fight through it, what they would have for breakfast tomorrow; amongst other things.

"Would you mind?" Hiroto asked Mordred.

"What?" She answered, not moving.

"You're poking me." He finished in an even tone, composed despite being as stiff as a corpse. "With many sharp pokey deathy things."

"Oh."

Hiroto almost impaled himself on her sword as he twitched beneath Mordred as she shed her armor in a flashy display. Metal turned to light motes turned to wow Kairi was really starting to find this wheel terribly interesting and that was a whole lot of skin that just got displayed beneath a suit that could be charitably called an outfit in maybe a red light district that was beneath Mordred's armor.

"...don't use that sort of command in a situation like this again, okay?" Mordred turned sharp green eyes at Kairi, rising from the old man's lap and moving to take a seat next to her Master.

She shook her blonde hair loose from the bun that held it back, leting it down into a golden waterfall. She hrew her feet up over the edge of the boat. The girl promptly ignored both men as she started running her fingers through her shoulder length hair.

"It worked." Kairi said. "This time."

"Excuse me!" Hiroto huffed. "I have to protest!"

"Can it wait?" Kairi wondered. "We have an exploding island situation."

Hiroto was red in the face, arms flailing around Mordred's lack of an outfit. His mustache trembled in sync with his mute gesticulations.

"You're excused this time." Mordred lightly waved a hand back at him. "Go over the side, but don't make a mess, alright?"

"I repeat." Kairi emphasized each word. "Exploding. Island. Situation."

"That isn't my business." She blandly said.

Kairi gave her a look.

"Just because I started it doesn't mean it's my business."

'Fuck you and your sword lessons too, jackass.' Mordred looked very content with her life, ignoring Hiroto's sputtered comments as she finally got to cool down after a long night's work.

She only wished she had something to drink as she watched the explosions.

* * *

Epilogue

* * *

You hear a beeping somewhere in the depths of your sleep addled mind, urgently dragging you from your dreams.

Groggily, you fumble about, and finally manage to grab your touchphone. Its harsh light briefly blinds you in the pitch blackness of your room. You squint angrily at the display, and try to make sense of the words appearing on the feed.

Then the rest of your brain takes over for the hindbrain and everything clicks in place.

"Holy shit."

Almost pulling your back in the process, you fumble out of bed, you gotta see this for yourself.

Leaving behind your phone and the message that had appeared on it.

'Turnabout?! Mullet Man, Edgy Exhibionist, and Mr. Monopoly topple the Dragonslayer?! Lanru-chan is getting excited! #itsmytimenow'

* * *

Next - Apocryphal Wars


	4. Chapter 4

Type Moon, cures all fungal infections, just one application! Type Moon is wholly owned and operated Notes Co. Ltd. (tm). All additional references belong to their respective companies.

03 - Lightless Forest

* * *

The ocean was magnificent, stretching far and wide.

It was petty, too big to particularly care.

Perhaps it even showed antipathy. A deep grudge against everything that chosen to breath air instead of staying in the water. A messy divorce that was in the midst of being closed out, millions of years in the making.

There a freight sailing to Africa full of supplies to an armed rebellion, over there a luxury cruiser fleeing to Antartica, and finally a small boat fleeing from London.

Let's see what happened if you shook them hard.

Oh.

One sank, crates full of supplies - treasure mundane and not, pulled to the depths. It would be in good company. Many things had sunk to the bottom of the seas within the recent years.

The ocean tried to bat at the boats again.

"Toll for the Brave," A speck on the smallest of the boats sang back, almost in spite to its attempts to knock them askew. "Brave that are no more! All sunk beneath the wave; Fast by their native shore!"

The waves recoiled, hissing back.

Kairi didn't have much room, so he leaned against the side of the cabin while singing.

"Nice tune," said a bored looking blonde. "I don't really get it, though. It sounds sorta ill-fated to me. You sure we should be singing while the weather is like this?"

She glanced up at the clouds overhead.

"You gotta sing when you're out at sea!" Hiroto laughed from behind Kairi, at the controls. "We gotta show something who's the boss around here."

"What do you mean?"

"Nature's slipped its leash in the last few decades." He shrugged, thinking about what they had to do in the name of destroying Yggdramillenia over the years. "So all we can do is stare at death in the face and sing."

Kairi stopped singing, taking in her quizzical expression.

"Have you never been on a ship before, Saber?" Her Master wondered.

Mordred leaned into her right arm, looking over the side.

"Can't say I have, no." She said, scooping her hand through nothing in particular. Water sprayed onto her fingers off from the sides of their boat. The knight breathed out an annoyed huff, shaking the droplets off. "I was stuck in Wales all my life."

Kairi was reminded of the mannerisms of a child that hadn't been taken on a trip.

"That's a shame," Hiroto shook his head. "Well, you get to experience something new now."

Kairi walked up to his servant, nudging her with his boot. She glanced up, her Master had taken off his sunglasses. He plopped them onto her face, their overly large frame almost falling off her face.

"Eight hundred of the Brave, whose courage well was tried," Kairi prompted her, slowing down to prompt her to follow along. "Had made the vessel heel, and laid her on her side,"

She blinked back at him.

Kairi waved a finger back and forth, keeping time.

"A land breeze shook the shrouds," Hiroto added his gravelier voice to Kairi's attempt, adjusting their speed as they skid over a small wave. "And she was overset,"

Mordred grabbed the side of Kairi's glasses, holding them steady.

"Down went the Royal George with all her crew complete." She trailed off, following the two men's lead with a hint of a smile.

* * *

Interns rushed about backstage. That was a fact of life. They had the thankless job of taking the blame whenever something went wrong.

Shit rolled downhill, as the saying went.

Normal interns had to worry about getting slapped or spit on at the worst. The ones that worked on Ranru and Friends wished they had it as good. As we observe, whilst one screams bloody murder and pours out the same from the gaping hole in their gut.

A puddle of blood swiftly grows, staining the plastic cup that had been filled with an ice cold latte.

Ranru, halfway through removing the makeup on her face, looks past the cooling corpse. Her eyes stare pointedly at the wide open door. Which was appropriate, since she had just stared literal holes through the former intern. The other person in the room didn't seem to care about the lethality of those eyes. The clown's gaze drips with annoyance while looking at the other person sitting at a makeup station next to hers.

Hopefully the combination of latte, blood, and annoyance caused her Rider to slip and made them crack their head open.

Rider is aware of the look, but doesn't care. They're in the middle of holding up a backless black top. A very careful gaze is sizing up the size of their shoulders against the size of the outfit.

"Close the door," Ranru ordered. "The children aren't allowed to see their hero out of makeup."

"Why's that?"

"It'd traumatize them for life!"

"You aren't that ugly, Celenike." Rider matches her syrupy tone, trying to console her. "Well, you know, people always say stuff like, into every life, a little rain must fall? So, it's perfectly okay for you to show your ugliness to people - even though that might be a body image thing. I mean, for the kids, it can help build character!"

Ranru's eyebrow twitched.

"My great uncle Constantine used to say that the scariest monsters tend to look pretty or cute, but I think that's probably hyperbole because he used to say a lot of things he didn't believe. Like, I'm cute, and I don't think I'm a monster, right? I mean, monsters go around blowing people up randomly, and-"

"Astolfo-"

"Hm?"

"Close the door..."

"Why don't you do it? Stop making them into bloody corpses that scare the children. Maybe meet some people. Also, I'd appreciate it if you didn't get your desperate self all up on me, thanks. Expand your horizons. A dark magician clown is the stuff of nightmares." Rider blabbed on rapidfire, taking a pose. Was Rider imagining what they'd look like with the top on. They lightly pout their lips together. "Think this top would go good with red lipstick?"

"You're my Servant."

"You got interns." Rider made a pahpah noise, wiggling their hand dismissively. "Work them to the bone and then kick them to the curb with a slightly padded resume as their own recompense."

"My intern is dead, Rider."

"Well, that sounds like a personal problem..." Rider said. "I wonder if Shishigou and Tohsaka are cool in person? TV sure does lie to you about people's personalities, y'know?"

Celenike Icecolle Yggdramillenia finished wiping off her make up. She placed Ranru's wig carefully down on the mannequin. The woman slicked her hair back with her fingers and put on her glasses over her cold eyes, uncaring of the slight bit of blood that had splashed on her hands.

"It won't matter," She looked at her smartphone. "They won't be alive much longer-"

The message she had received was curt.

'Two days,' - Gordes.

Rider scrunched up their face.

"Dying surrounded by mummified cats..."

Celenike ignored the jab. She started stroking the wig she wore. She raised her hand, winking at herself while sticking her tongue out.

A flicker of red light appeared from within her remaining eye.

"Now don't be like that, Rider!" She pitched her voice even higher than she did as Ranru. "Cuteness beat justice!"

Pieces of the mirror rained down from a head sized hole in it.

* * *

They had traveled a whole day now. The choppy waters had grown tentative, the currents now nudging their boat to and fro. They could see waves building up around them, somehow avoiding the vicinity yet surrounding it, like a beast on the prowl.

It was slightly unnerving.

"Aah, the weather is clearing up," said Mordred, casually pulling out her sword from the engine. It briefly sputtered and died as it was deprived of precious electricity. She pointed Clarent down towards the clear waters, for emphasis. "Too bad we don't have fishing rods."

Kairi adjusted the rear view mirror the previous owner of the boat had whimsically place in the cabin he was sitting inside.

"You can fish?" He wondered.

Mordred held her arms apart far past her shoulders, as if bragging about the size of her catches.

Hiroto stirred from his seat in between Mordred and Kairi, rubbing sleep out of his eyes with the back of his hand.

"What are you talking about?" He mumbled, coughing once to clear his throat. "You'd snap a line with something like that."

Mordred's eyes narrowed.

"You calling me a liar?"

"Are you the heroic spirit of fly fishing?" Hiroto asked.

The blonde blinked.

"I'm the Knight of Treachery."

"So there's my answer."

"Hey!"

"We're slowing down. What are you two doing back there?" Kairi reached up to adjust his glasses. Then he remembered his Servant was still wearing them. When was she going to give them back? Was he going to have to ask for them back?

-would he have to use a Command Seal to get them back?

Were sunglasses worth a miracle?

Well...

Kairi turned around in his seat, cutting that thought.

"Saber, Hiroto, are you two going to unzip your pants next?" He frowned a little. "That's going to be pointless- one of you is lacking pants at the moment."

"What?" Hiroto blinked.

"For that big dick waving contest you two are having," Kairi shook his head, waving at the horizon. "We gotta keep going, guys. We won't hit Amsterdam by tomorrow morning at this rate. Didn't you two want us to engage in glorious combat? Knowing the Yggs, they're waiting for us on the shore with twenty thousand cannons and a red carpet."

Saber looked down at Hiroto smugly.

"That means you too, Saber."

Mordred didn't budge.

"I believe you about the fish." He had a very Saint-like look in his eye. "Please, Saber?"

"You people and your stupid technology," Mordred threw up her arms, shrugging without apparent care. "I'm not a walking battery."

"Yes, but my training doesn't cover raising the spirit of a dead engine." He pointed out. "Can't you Tesla this thing any harder?"

She spun towards it with a huff.

"Can't believe my Clarent is being used this way," She grumbled. Then she thought a little, pulling the memories she had been gifted from the Grail. Tesla was who again? "Tesla was a sham!"

Hiroto gasped, looking at her in horror.

Mordred plopped down, fiddling with her glasses. Victory was hers.

* * *

The moon shone on the surface of the water.

The ocean gleamed like a mirror beneath them, its dark depths reflecting the skies above them. It was like their boat was sliding across the heavens. Mordred looked a touched unnerved seeing her own face reflected back at her.

"What's going on here?" She wondered, pulling away from the edge.

Kairi had his hands on the engine, fiddling over the rumbling piece of junk. The old man was standing next to him, occasionally humming or nodding. She could recall some of her knights doing the same in the past. Except it was standing over their horses whenever they inevitably broke their legs, hemming and hawwing over whether to put the damn beast down.

"Is it going to carry us the whole way?" Kairi was asking Hiroto, rapping his fist against the casing. "It can't last much longer."

"I got some tricks," The older man mumbled something under his breath. "Prana burst won't get this old man down."

"Hey," She called out again. "Why is the sea so reflective?"

"You're just mumbling, old man." Kairi was louder. Probably because he had to start shouting over the banging noises the engine was making. "Repeating the word 'gemstones' isn't solving our problems."

Hiroto pressed the upper part of his fingers against his forehead.

"Kaleidoscope?"

"That isn't a solution either!"

Mordred sighed. Was she going to have to cut that infernal mechanism down? It was going to end like it did with that one squire's mare, wasn't it? Mordred didn't do tears, she did solutions.

She turned away from the annoying sight, gazing down at the water.

Reflected in the surface of the unnaturally smooth water was an island they were about to hit.

Three seconds ago.

The two men, who were too busy debating the use of gems as an alternative fuel source -dinosaurs became gemstones *and* fuel, Hiroto argued to Kairi's red faced ire-, were sent stumbling forwards against each other. The front of their boat had collided against the rusted frame of a once mighty beast, which the Grail had informed Mordred was an automobile. It didn't look particularly mobile now, plucked clean of its innards by the carrion crows of time, but it was rather pointy.

"We've sprung a leak," Mordred idly pointed out, up to her bared toes in water. "One of you fix it, I'm going ashore."

She placed a foot on the edge of the boat and sprung off towards the island.

"We made her mad." Hiroto blushed a little.

Kairi grunted, making a face as he looked after Saber's back.

"She still has my glasses..."

* * *

Mordred had been getting antsy. Nothing had shown up during the days following their escape. There was a high probability that this island was the attack she had been expecting for the last three days.

She squinted behind Kairi's glasses as its outline became clearer.

Guess they had dropped the act too.

Mid-way through her leap, prana surged to life around her form.

She couldn't wear her father's face into battle. She donned the helmet she preferred to show her lessers. Time to take care of this before the magi were dragged into combat.

Saber barreled through the sand, her shoulder charge blasting aside more of those automobiles as she went. One flipped end over end before slamming into the rocky shores of a cliff. Rocks fell, crushing a circular pastry held up by a rather rotund man. His jolly red cheeks had cracked with age, turning pinkish in hue.

Mordred had successfully stormed the beach.

Fatalities: One mascot.

"Come out here!" She waved Clarent about, "Does this fat man have the most honor?!"

Apparently, yes.

"Saber, what the hell?" She heard splashing and Kairi's voice behind her. "You killed Mr. Donut."

"He looked suspicious."

"But he gives delicious treats..."

Kairi stepped next to her, scanning the horizon. He was water logged up to the knees. It was hard because a tangle of light poles and other refuse was stacked up top. At the same time, it told him all they needed to know.

"We go further?"

"Yeah, Hiroto is pulling the boat free."

They saw more signs that someone was around, tracks in the sand lead off the beach.

"Something got dragged up there."

"These footsteps look off. They aren't deep enough if that's the case, Master. I'm not exactly in full control of the way my lightning arcs, could you stay a little further back? I don't want you to draw in the storm."

"Alright."

Mordred kept on point. A set of stairs went up to a cracked road. Neither Master or Servant wanted to go down that way. There were more automobiles, with far more metal on them still, that way. It was a good ambush point.

They went further up the hills.

Kairi saw common waste off the path. Some candy bars. Beer cans with the plastic ties wrapped around their necks- the necromancer imagined Teene would've throttled that can's former owner particularly hard.

A set of eyes staring at him from the stump of a tree.

"Zap. Three o'clock."

His Saber pivoted in place, but she didn't zap. Her sword met the descending branches of a tree. They sliced through several reedy looking ones, but got tangled in supernatural growth.

Kairi moved to interfere, a curse of rot on his lips.

A child sized tree trunk slammed into his back, wrapping roots around his back and legs as it pulled him.

"Get off!" Saber punched a treant in the face, but more came at her.

More yellow-orange eyes flooded onto the stairs, overwhelming numbers.

* * *

It was a good half hour before Hiroto got the boat ashore. The boat now had a large patch of zinc growth along the hull. The scales had sealed up the hole rather well.

The elder Tohsaka took a moment to look over the island from top to bottom. Now where were the others - he could make out a hastily scrawled message in the sand, written with a burst of magic. It had been wiped away.

Now wasn't that ominous?

Hiroto couldn't feel the presence of a Servant nearby.

"Hello?" He called. "Kairi? Saber?"

No answer.

Hiroto hung his head. His young ward and Servant must be using the excuse of a midnight island paradise to sneak around. Well, Kairi was about the age for it, wasn't he?

Well, he would not get in their way and ruin the mood.

Still, that left Hiroto alone, and without a thing to occupy his time.

That just wouldn't do.

Hiroto fetched his cane from the boat and began to scrawl lines in the sand. Once he was done he slammed the butt of his staff into the center of the pattern. The air over his head lit up with magical circles, a tiny part of the larger system that had been engraved into the land itself.

"Concealing an entire island within the spot dust specks linger," Hiroto clicked his tongue in admiration, leaning forward and poking a line in the spell. "What a brilliant idea! I wish I could meet whoever came up with this. They must have been a genius."

"Eh?" A flustered young woman asked, suddenly standing on his side. "You think so? That they were a genius?"

"Oh yes," He looked away from the magic. Well, there was half of the mystery solved. Now why was she wearing that tasteful floral kimono. "You wear that well, Saber."

"H-huh?" Her hair looked a little more ash grey in the moon. "Thank you! You wouldn't believe the hassle I went through to get this out here."

Hiroto was too much of a gentleman to say out loud why he thought she had gotten meeker all of a sudden. And why she had to change outfits in the aftermath. He sure could think about it the privacy of his own head, however.

"Well, let's go fetch that useless man, Saber."

Maybe pin some sort of award to his chest for calming Saber down so much, ye gods.

Hiroto started to move, but felt the cold metal of a katana press up against the side of his neck.

Large tendrils rose from the depths of the ocean, dragging up thousands of gallons of water and covering the entire beach with a freezing mist. They waved about the multiple limbs of the kraken, but groaned like an old wooden armoire. It smelled faintly of jasmine.

"Again, thank you so much for the compliment! Well, master didn't think there was any practical use in turning a martial arts technique into a magecraft, but even he admitted that it turned out better than he imagined. I didn't think that made me a genius!" The person that definitely wasn't Saber was pretty infectiously cheery. "It almost makes me wish I didn't have to feed you to Master Einnashe!"

One of the tendrils came down smashing their boat to pieces.

* * *

The steady beating of a drum, punctuated by sudden beats, lead a long line of treants up the winding mountain road. They swayed from side to side, undulating to the beat. Their vines swayed up towards the skies, striking them against power cables above with a synchronized twanging noise.

Electricity raced along these cables, briefly lighting up countless buildings in that pitch black mountain.

Golden lights shining against the dark for a brief moment.

"Where are they taking us?"

"Let me go!"

"They caught you, old man?"

"I burned down six before I was caught."

"Yeah? I got eight. Had to get jumped from behind."

"I'll ram Clarent down your pistils!"

A kimono wearing girl twirled a little as she hopped backwards to join the trio, still beating her drum to the beat. The three treants the outsiders were strapped to and dangled from shook from side to side. Vines tickled their faces, the tips blooming into flowers.

"Please don't shout." She said. "We very rarely get guests, why not enjoy the show?"

Mordred froze.

"That's Father's face!" She roared, bouncing towards the kimono clad female with gauntlets outstretched. "It's mine! Give it back! Witch!"

The treant shuffled to the right, slamming Mordred hard against its bark. The knight struggled, but part of her body sunk into the trunk. Predominantly the lower part of her head.

The insults were effectively silenced.

"Yikes!" The woman leaned away. "You got an attitude."

The treant swayed into Okita, bumping into her hips.

"Thank you!"

The magi looked at each other.

"What are you?" Kairi asked.

The kimono clad girl danced away from the treant, wiggling her hips back and forth to the beat.

"I'm Okita," She bobbed her head. "No more questions. The only thing that matters is Limbo."

The treants hopped up, slapping their vines against the cables once again, and came down with a thunderous clap.

A devastated city stretched out as far as the eye could see all around them.

Okita danced out in front of all three of them, bowing towards a pair of treants. The duo twirled and spun around her. Their vines lightly touched, as if they were waltzing.

"It's the only thing they have now." She said, profile lit by bombed out buildings.


	5. Chapter 5

Behind them, the metropolis was lightless - a graveyard of monolithic hulks standing sentinel beneath the night sky, as if a monument to the twilight of civilization.

An occasional burst of light could be seen within random buildings.

A matching light would answer it from the top of the mountain overlooking the valley the city rested within.

A line of willowy trees bounced up and down a winding road in two lines, constantly heading to and away from the peak of the mountain. They skipped past rusted husks of cars, skeletons still operating them. Their vines hung low, dragging over shattered concrete.

Several roads rose from the depths of the city, more trees stomping out from the darkness and joining the line of dancing trees.

Up ahead, a fence drooped off what remained of a handful of rotted wooden posts. The trees shimmeyed past, a few of them nudging the fence on their way. It let out a squeak, falling a little more.

A low grumble sounded out from the shadows, attracted by the noise.

The trees froze in place, shaking the leaves sparsely spread about their bodies.

There appeared to crouch a vaguely humanoid form in the shadows of a damaged building in the distance, observing the procession and ritual; or perhaps it was a trick of the light, casting the silhouette.

A steady glow formed at the tips of their leaves.

It was an effigy, made in a rough human form from pieces of the road behind them. One of the sticks jammed in its side had come loose. Several stones were scattered about it, with a quarter of a skull staring sightlessly up at the trees. Their leaves went still, and they resumed their dancing march up the path.

A figure darted behind them, unseen.

*-*-*

The new arrivals dangled from a tangled mass of vines and leaves. They couldn't see anything past the mass of greenery wrapped around them, but the two men could hear Mordred cursing up a storm faintly behind. Both of them winced as they bounced hard against the ground. Up ahead, they could hear several shrill whistles mournfully going through the wind.

"Let them up," ordered Okita. "It's time for a break."

The trees stopped, but their barks continued wiggling from side to side.

"What he doesn't know won't hurt us."

Their binds slithered from their faces, leaving trails of grease in their wake. But they weren't released, instead they were raised up to eye level with the strange girl. She smiled at Kairi in particular, reaching for the gourd hanging from her obi.

"We're almost at my Master's place," said Okita. "But I forgot; you've all been on the sea, right?"

Okita moved towards them, holding up a gourd of water.

"Here, have some." she smiled. "It won't turn you all into abominations against nature and god, trust me."

Kairi and Tohsaka looked at each other.

"We're good," they said in time.

Okita pouted.

Mordred flailed in her bondage, face flushed and glaring bloody murder.

"Let us go, stupid bitch!" screamed Mordred. "And take off that face!"

"But I'm attached to it..."

Okita leaned to the side, avoiding her spittle. She reached into her sleeves. Mordred went still, glaring at the small sheathed knife the other girl was now holding.

"Oh?" Morded showed her teeth.

Okita undid the purple rags wrapped around the sheathe, leaned up to Mordred and managed to dab at her chin. She pulled her fingers back before Mordred could snap at them. In response, even more vines wrapped around the knight.

"Well, break's over!" with a clap, Okita took a swig of her gourd and then started waving her arms over her head.

Several of the trees pulled their roots out of the ground and started moving, others needing to be cajoled.

Mordred simply angrily flailed, but it just caused herself to sway hard to and fro. Neither Kairi nor Tohsaka appreciated feeling her slam into their sides, but they didn't dare complain.

*-*-*

"You know," Hiroto started speaking out of the blue. "You keep surprising me."

Kairi grunted, wiggling his nose in a way to try and keep his glasses from falling.

It was a losing battle.

"I thought you'd have a more fiery personality," continued Hiroto. "Argumentative, loud, prone to anger."

He paused, and they could hear Mordred howling behind them.

"Gee, thanks." sarcastically answered Kairi. "I'd be held prisoner with you anyday too."

"You're surprisingly sedate, Kairi."

"Is it the leather?" the younger man continued. "It's the leather, right?"

"To be honest, you look like a bass guitarist of a heavy metal band."

"Not cool," droned Kairi. "You might as well call me a cuck."

Hiroto shook his head.

"Anyway," continued Kairi. "This is comfortable."

He frowned at the vines.

"Most of the time," he cleared his throat, pitching his voice to sound more nasal. "Can you imagine me wearing a tweed jacket? 'Oh, Tohsaka-kun, I got the annual budget reports for the gemstone mines in Africaaa.' God, I'd shrivel up and die, man."

"Some of my colleagues stand out," Hiroto shook his head. "Almost as much as you do."

"Y'work with a buncha super special coconuts, huh?"

His glasses finally fell off his face.

"Dammit," he had paid a hundred bucks for those.

The kimono glad girl was suddenly in front of them, his shades in her hands.

"I think you'd look handsome," Okita opinioned, having wormed her way next to them. "Just like I thought."

"Woah!"

Kairi gave a start, swaying.

"Your scars would compliment them?" Okita stammered. She moved her hands in increasingly bizzare motions. Swaying them up and down, wiggling them here and there, trying to signal for the mothership. "Uhm, yeah. That was all. Bye."

She vanished.

With his shades, at that.

"This is why I wear 'em," he grimaced. "I like to fade into the crowd."

"Doubt it," Hiroto grinned.

*-*-*

Mordred tried to kick, shuddering impotently as the vines tightened around her yet again.

"What sort of spectacles are these?" Okita appeared before Mordred, waving her Master's shades. "I don't think it could let anyone read anything in the candlelight."

"It's the bitch...!"

Okita blinked, poking her collarbone with his glasses.

"Woof?"

Mordred screamed.

Okita blinked.

She kept screaming.

Okita leaned back.

The other woman was turning red.

Okita rubbed her cheek, looking around uneasily. She drew a little closer. Then she poked Mordred in the side.

Mordred flailed about.

"You're going to hurt your throat," cautioned Okita unnecessarily. "It's okay. I'm not sure why you're so traumatized about these spectacles, but since your friend was wearing them, I can guarantee that they're perfectly safe. If you want, we can ask your friend when we meet my Master. Please stop screaming, you're weirding me out."

Okita was wincing, half covering her ears.

Mordred panted, staring sullenly up at her.

The kimono girl pumped her fist, gripping her forearm.

"Good lung power, though." praised Okita. "You could do a pretty good spirit shout? I used to do them with my friends all the time. Saaay, what's your name? I'm Okita. You got a cute style. Are you from the big city?"

Here, she nervously giggled.

"Uhm, not to be vain or anything, since we look alike."

Okita nibbled on the tips of the spectacles.

"What's up with that, anyway?" wondered Okita.

Mordred's eyebrow twitched.

If this was some face stealer, it was incredibly stupid.

*-*-*

They finally arrived at the top.

What greeted them wasn't merely one huge tree. An entire forest was up above. It was a spread for the eyes, lush greenery that they hadn't seen below. The first thing that they noticed was that the air. It was much cooler than even ten feet down the road. It tasted cleaner up here too, for lack of a better word.

The second thing that immediately came to mind; Several rows of trees seemed almost supernaturally still in the slight breeze, with roots tensely coiled as if ready to advance upon them at a moment's notice.

Thirdly; Everything had become muted, for lack of a better word. The cacophony of noises their escort was making was washed out. The dirt below them absorbed the antics silently. What was a racket of wood crashing against itself became as if two sticks were hitting each other.

Lastly: Was it just him, or did Kairi just see a rat come in with them, then shrivel up and die on the spot?

Shit.

This was an Otherworld, much like Teene had described to Kairi in his training; a place where a man's common sense wasn't going to get you very far.

Kairi, Hiroto, and Mordred were unceremoniously dropped in a sparse clearing a ways inside, gouged out pits dotted the outlining edges of the area. They bounced once within their bondage, then the vines rapidly unfurled away from their bodies. The trio hit the ground rolling, gasping as air once again entered their lungs. Once they flopped onto the ground, the trees turned and carelessly bounced back down the road they had taken to get here.

Mordred glanced up.

There wasn't even a second glance spared for them.

The knight got up onto a knee, but her Master's arm was on her arm.

Kairi shook his head.

Her tension eased, just a little.

A few of the trees wandered straight towards the holes, Okita at their heels.

"You guys were great," enthused Okita. "Thanks for the hard work! Have a good nap. I'll mix my special blend up for all of you later."

She was darting around, appearing and disappearing throughout the clearing faster than they could follow. She was helping them settle down in the deep holes. While they did most of the hard work of moving the dirt onto their own roots, she was down on her knees pushing handfuls of the stuff in there as well.

A vine came down and rapped the kimono girl on the head.

"Ahaha!" Okita laughed at something only she could hear.

Since they were being ignored, the newcomers went ahead and made themselves uncomfortably comfortable in the absence of any overt threat.

Kairi frowned over at Okita.

"Geomancy is a dangerous advantage, yes." Hiroto agreed with the younger man. He silently mourned the loss of his suit. The sap on it was never going to come off. "Having nature on your side means the world is literally against your enemies."

Kairi blinked and turned towards Hiroto.

"Uh, yes."

Mordred bristled.

"Obviously," She ground out. "Master is more concerned with other - more important - things."

"Her speed is concerning." the older man agreed.

Mordred rubbed at her scalp.

"Not that!"

"Why does she look like you?" muttered Kairi. "Do you know her, Saber?"

"It's a facestealer," she sounded sure. "Trying to deceive me by looking like my father."

"I don't sense a grudge..." Kairi trailed off.

Hiroto hummed, more interested in what Mordred had said at the end. That was an interesting bit of trivia. He never knew that King Arthur was so girly looking. That'd be an interesting fact to share with little Rin at their next tea party.

"Does it matter?" sounded Hiroto off. "We haven't been attacked."

"Then what the hell was what we went through, huh?!"

"Something that consenting adults sometimes have to pay to get..."

"Huh?" Mordred blinked, brought up short. "What?"

The explanation had to wait. A deep groaning beneath the earth drew their attention. Mordred immediately leapt in front of the two humans, instinctively bringing her sword out before her.

"We're under attack!"

Neither of the men were very fazed as they saw several lumps move beneath the dirt towards a single point.

"Calm, Saber." Kairi advised. "Tohsaka and myself would already be dead if it wanted."

Hiroto raised an eyebrow.

"Spotted that, huh?" He smiled. "You really are calm."

Several vines tore of the earth, hemorrhaging dirt, grass, and pebbles everywhere. The wound left in the ground slowly undid itself in front of their eyes, a clock unwinding itself. It was a little disturbing to see the debris slowly gravitate towards the pit, like matter drawn towards a blackhole. They chose to glance at the man sized seed that was being choked by the vines.

"Ah," Okita looked up from where she was patting some dirt down. "Thank you for the courtesy, Master!"

She padded towards the seed.

One second Okita was smiling. The she was next to the seed, holding a weapon just as dangerous as Mordred's own. Whatever had happened between one moment to the next was lost, like film cells burnt out while inside the can.

Mordred stared at Okita's weapon.

It didn't bay for blood like Clarent, but there was a quietly assurance of termination within it.

Okita waved at her.

The seed jolted in place, gaining several deep slashes along its surface. It split opened like a flower, or maybe a rotten watermelon, as the scent could attest. Okita's belated warning to step back wasn't needed, as the men were already falling back.

Hiroto was trying his best not to gag.

"Here," Kairi handed the older man a tube from his pocket. "Rub that under your nose."

Momotaro had been stillborn.

The corpse within the wet, fleshy folds of the pit was well past decomposition state, but the scent of blood and meat was heavy in the breeze. The mummy was lashed towards the large seeds by a patchwork of thin vines. They were discolored by whatever juices were slathered over the bared form of the husk, and queerly resembled veins.

They were pulsing before their eyes, the veins transparent enough to show some sort of fluid was moving through them.

"You brought us here to show us a corpse?" demanded Mordred.

Okita said nothing, resting against the exterior of the seed.

"Look again," Kairi said, having been staring at the mummy's face the whole time. "He's been imitating the motions of breathing this whole time."

"Oh," Okita blinked. Then she looked pleased. "So that's what your spectacles were for, limiters for those sharp eyes of yours."

The husk moved more overtly this time.

It lips went into the motions of a smile. The remnants of several broken grey teeth clung to black gums. However, what made Hiroto immediately tense was the length of an inhumanly long, sharp canine.

"Vampire!"

Okita moved off the seed and stood directly between their group and the corpse.

"This Okita-san will now intrepret," She barked, "'Welcome to the Disemboweling Sea of Trees, humans. I am its Lord, Einnashe. I offer only the impartiality of death.'"

Mordred bristled.

"What do you mean?" began Kairi.

A high pitched whistle cut through the night, ending with a blast of light erupting off to the east. It was in the heart of the city. Wait, wasn't that what had been happening the whole time they had been ascending?

"'You have brought meaningless strife to my shores,'" Okita solemnly spoke. "'The Holy Grail War has followed you, humans.'"

Mordred nearly whipped Hiroto in the face with her ponytail, glaring helplessly in the distance and back at the vampire and Servant duo arrayed in front.

"What does it matter to you, monster?" she demanded.

Okita's expression siffened.

All the roots glowed within with phosphorescent light. A dusting of mana rose into the air. The air grew heavy as a vision appeared in mid-air, a shining mandala glowing like a dying ember in a campfire.

"Formalcraft...?" Mordred grit her teeth. "What is all this magic?!"

"Command seals!"

"'Humans, drive the invaders away,'" Okita reached for her sword. "'Or forfeit your lives to my champion's blade.'"

*-*-*

Lanru-kun had nothing against cute. Cute was a weapon, to be used against the unintelligent masses. However, there weren't 'unintelligent masses' here. Just her and the annoyingly unreasonable, unreasonably annoying bundle of cute that was the Paladin of Charlemagne.

"I bet this city would've been a real marvel before it was covered by mud and curses and all that," the boy was pointing out as they swung low through the buildings on the back of his griffon. "These people really got it, y'know? Look at how they had way more nature untouched in their city than most. That whole segment there is natural forest, or was before it was turned unnatural."

The small camera on his shoulder, fed by a bulky set of equipment hanging off his shoulders by harnesses finished scanning the horizon.

Lanru dug her nails into his sides.

"I'm sure that walking tree is appreciating life far more than before," Lanru quipped with an unnaturally wide smile, once she was sure the camera was back on her. "It can go out and find its own meals now!"

"Like, there's zero respect being shown to the people at all, right?" Astolfo continued without acknowledging her. "Bet they toiled away a lot to find all the materials to build up that skyscraper, just for it all to be brushed aside by egomaniacs who're totally envious and small minded."  
"But Astolfo," she answered melancholically. "If they were so smart..."

Lanru was pulling several meters worth of handkerchef out of her front pocket, dabbing it at her eye.

"Why'd they die?" the clown pitched her tone higher than usual.

Astolfo yanked the reigns, bringing them onto the ground suddenly.

"Let Lanru-kun share a story with you, Children; there were an ant and grasshopper who lived together in harmony. They worked together to gather food, and they were both very happy. But how much food could two bugs get together? They're tiny! One day, Mein Fuhrer arrived in the forest and saw them working hard. So moved by their work ethic, he made them a deal: Come, join me and I'll make sure you're fed forever!"

She clapped her gloves hands.

"Imagine how nice that'd be? No need for food rations. You just eat whatever you want, whenever you want..."

Astolfo gave her the cold shoulder, so she kept going.

"Ant said yes, because it was clever and wise." she smiled. "And the grasshopper...? Well, it was rolling around in the mud that winter, that's for sure!"

She giggled as she ended her story.

"See?" Lanru was all smiles, hopping off the griffon. She lapped up the camera's attention as she bounced around Astolfo. "If they knew better, they should have listened to us. Right kids? Your parents always say to listen to them. They listen to us, and that's why you have a home. You don't listen, and this happens."

She wiggled a finger at the camera.

"Time for us to take care of some naughty people, kids." She twirled. "We'll be back after a commercial break!"

The light on the camera went off, and so did Lanru's smile.

"Get down from there, idiot." she continued in a deeper tone. "We're not going to make that necromancer's job any easier."

Astolfo hopped off the griffon, banshing it with a nod and pat to the side.

"You know," said Astolfo. "You don't need to put on a tough front before your faithful Servant. Tell it to me straight. Did he jilt you or something? Was it a bad breakup?"

"Hardly," she scoffed. "I'm interested-"

"Ew."

"-in his necromancy," Lanru blandly rolled past Astolfo. "He defeated us in our territory, of course we won't let the peons delude themselves into thinking they have a fighting chance."

"Blame your group's disgusting PR, not him."

The makeup around Lanru's lips cracked as she grinned manically.

"Also, if I kill him, I can rub it that whore's face." She pulled the riding crop from her side, playfully swinging it from side to side. "Won't she be sad to see him die?"

"Ah," he quirked his head. "So something relating to a breakup, afterall."

Lanru cracked the crop against the side of his face.

Astolfo blinked, blandly looking at the strip of leather harmlessly pressed against the side of his face.

"Ow?" He obliged her.

Lanru sighed, she wanted to go back home soon.

*-*-*

It didn't look like metal, but Kairi's boots clanked as he stepped across the brown, moss-covered surface - depressing in the tell-tale manner of a car's chassis. It sounded brittle, but thankfully didn't cave in, and he reached the ground on the other side of the mound safely.

"I mean c'mon, holding an old guy hostage in exchange for helping to defend your island? Usually when I get hired for this sort of thing, my employer has the decency to provide health benefits." Kairi said over his breath.

Okita perked up from behind them.

"I'd say continued survival is a good benefit," She bubbled on. "Not that Master was going to kill you."

"Do tell." He drawled.

"He figured you were smart enough to realize the invaders would kill us all and this was for the best," She took a deep breath. "Also because you totally beat the odds the first time. How'd you do that anyway? Master told me that they had an army, and you two are pretty unarmyish in comparison, y'know?"

Kairi held his hands up, trying to process the torrent of words.

"...and the old man is a liability anyway, I think." Okita drew to a stop a few seconds after the fact.

"Enough with the babbling," spoke Mordred, following his act by simply sliding through the top of the car in her full set of armor. "We're almost there."

Damn ghosts.

A murder of crows took flight from a dead burch, spooked by her voice. They swept away towards the horizon, swinging past the crumbling smokestack of the factory they were walking past. He saw their profiles briefly through several of the holes pockmarked along and through the building.

"Master said you'd be able, but it still mystifies me how you can track each other." The third of their group was perched on the roof of the car, squatting low in a white and blue coat with skirted uniform as she surveyed the area.

The necromancer looked back at her voice.

He caught a good look at her bared thighs and legs, and quickly turned away.

"Then how'd you find us on the beach earlier?" asked Kairi, scanning the area for any other traps. "If you can't feel out your fellow Servants?"

Huh, he peered closer at the birch.

The surface of the tree was split open. Was that silhoutte he could barely make out within it another human? Were all the trees stuffed with a corpse? Something to consider another time.

Once they took care of things, and got Hiroto back from Einnashe.

"Master is a great magus," answered the warrior, playing with the ends of her scarf wrapped around her neck. "He felt you all enter, just like he felt those other intruders..."

"What I want to know," curtly interrupted Mordred. "Is why you're following?"

Okita pointed at herself, with a look of wide eyed surprise.

"Yes." the knight jabbed at Okita. "You."

The samurai stepped back, wary of any swords following that digit.

"I want to help," insisted Okita. "The old man seems nice, and I don't want him to just be fertilizer for Master."

She made a show of covering her mouth, like if she was sharing a great secret.

"Master gets more than enough sustainenace since we wandered into this part of the ocean," She revealed, while looking around like expecting someone to jump out at any moment. "I don't want him to backpedal into craving human blood after all my efforts."

"What? Are you claiming you weaned him off blood? How's that even possible?" Kairi blinked.

Okita let out a strange laugh.

"Patience!"

Kairi's interest grew.

"Trees feeding off blood is a very traditional thing, and so I'm actually breaking tradition a bit," She rubbed her nose, offering a sheepish smile. "I made him go 'green'."

Okita gave a thumbs up.

"I used to take care of the sakura trees back home!" her hands tapped her sheathed blade. "The nice pink color of the blossoms comes from the blood of the guilty, after all."

"Vampires are beasts," Mordred pitched her voice in just the right way. "This is just as barbaric as eating humans."

"Why?" Okita's flat answer came out of nowhere. "Because they're dead?"

"Well..."

"The dead aren't that special," she quipped. "I'm dead, and I don't think I'm that special. In fact, if everyone used souls as power, nobody would ever run out of natural resources! It's economic!"

Okita threw her arms out.

"Let me tell you what I've seen while at Master's side all these years. We live in an age of the Dead. It's a Boom for all things that go 'Wooo' in the night. An army of the undead that haven't shoved humans out of the spotlight through the grace of some kind of god. We have a surplus on corpses; bad stock that never leaves and just rots away on the shelf. This world of ours is jam packed with grudge and curses, letting whoever has even the slightiest preoccupation when they died come on back, no questions asked. You ask me why I don't respect the dead? Because they're just a big number to me. One I can feed to Master, so the precious few living ones get a chance to live another day."

Mordred hesistated.

"Uh," She shifted, her armor plates masking something muttered beneath her breath. "Sorry."

Okita hopped down, patting Mordred on the shoulder.

"It's alright," She chirped. "We're soul sisters."

Mordred bristled.

"Since when?!" the knight lashed back.

"Why, I think you would want all the allies you can get." A female clown bubbled as she swagged out from the shadows of nearby alley. "Isn't that how you pulled yourselves out of our jaws last time?"

An air siren whipped through the skies, and a massive shape blotted out the stars.

It was a whale of a dirigible. Scale in excess! Excess of scale that spread uncontrollably in every direction! Dozens of lights, hundreds of floors, a kaleidoscope shone all the colors of the rainbow.

Beneath the rows of multicolored LEDs that adorned the sides of the airship, the lower surface was of a reflective, gold-colored fabric, illuminated in moving circles as if by spotlights from below - but upon the ocean surface that it passed, there were no lights.

What a wasteful use of magecraft.

The cloth weaved tight over the top of the balloon showed a garishly dresed clown beckoning the viewer towards a tent.

"Well, I brought backup this time too!" The clown gleefully announced, bouncing to the side as she wiggled her hands up at the blimp. Several small boats were detaching from the main blimp. They looked like small little lifeboats. Each were manned by freakishly tall, thin men in a circusmaster outfit complete with three foot tall top hats. "A carnival of fun for one and all!"

Several chimeric animals were dropped from the bottom of the blimp; creatures like a bipedial alligator with lizard tails and wicked claws, a buerish lion headed octopus dripping with viscera, a tusked giraffe with odd patterns to its coat, a cluster of vines with goat heads hanging heavy on the tips, and others floated down on balloons through a storm of confetti belched in the wake of the blimp.

A griffon majestically flapped down from the top floor of the factory, its pink haired rider giving them a terse look.

"Sorry," said the Rider.

That was the only warning they had before fireworks were launched from the sides of the blimp.

Flashes of light erupted about the island - the detonations of explosive payloads hidden amongst the fireworks that the airship had launched.

"Aah!" Okita shrieked. "You're ruining all my hardwork!"

"Kairi Shishigou," The clown howled at the necromancer, throwing her arms out as she presented the grim tableaux. "Welcome to Lanru-kun's Playhouse!"

"Tch, how obnoxious. Another loud show? How'd you get this bankrolled after the first failure, Celenike?" Kairi screwed his face, "Or has Darnic gone senile since I resigned?"

Lanru laughed, flopping about in her overly large shoes.

"Don't you worry, Kairi. You won't be lonely for long. I'll send your daughter down shortly after you." she giggled, clapping her hands together.

A shadow darted across Kairi's eyes.

"Saber!" he hissed through clenched teeth.

Mordred charged at the clown and her Servant.

"Celebrate the end of the world down in hell all by yourself, Celenike!"


End file.
